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People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns? v.7

People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns? v. 7
It is immensely inevitable that cities have been such a place for uniting due to the various number of convenient conditions, unfortunately, leading to manifold sophisticated issues directly threatening the quality of residents’ lives. In my view, I fundamentally concur with the following viewpoint that there should the government’s measures to re- orient the country’s population by fostering people having accommodation at regional area. As far as I mentioned, the over uniting state at main cities is the primary reason which takes responsibilities of multiple problems occurring at the crowded sites, for example, thief, robbery, traffic jams or contaminated habitats, …, contributing to forming negative living environments. It is the crucial government’s mission that imperatively encourages city dwellers to change their current home-location with good adaptation and integration at new the accommodation. Inevitably, places with less exploitation could maintain their own tremendous potential and away- urban towns are those when owning the vast horizon which is available for serving such a number of human’s demands. Moreover, the re- directing with no spontaneous plan seems to be immensely helpful when the transference towards a home- position of habitants can significantly decline the pressure upon the living capacity of Megalopolitan. It also creates such a good platform for these places several opportunities to raise the life quality up compared to city life. To conclude, had it not been for the deliberate concentration of city population without careful orientation during the last period, there would have been manifold current issues. Encouragement regarding moving to regional towns is essential to effectively exploit resources in different areas contributing to national development and decreasing the burden on the interurban area, solving a range of sophisticated problems.
It is
immensely
inevitable that
cities
have been such a place for uniting due to the various number of convenient conditions, unfortunately, leading to manifold sophisticated issues
directly
threatening the quality of residents’
lives
. In my view, I
fundamentally
concur with the following viewpoint that there should the
government
’s measures to re- orient the country’s population by fostering
people
having accommodation at regional area.

As far as I mentioned, the over uniting state at main
cities
is the primary reason which takes responsibilities of multiple problems occurring at the crowded sites,
for example
, thief, robbery, traffic jams or contaminated habitats, …, contributing to forming
negative
living environments. It is the crucial
government
’s mission that
imperatively
encourages city dwellers to
change
their
current
home-location with
good
adaptation and integration at new the accommodation.

Inevitably
, places with less exploitation could maintain their
own
tremendous potential and away- urban towns are those when owning the vast horizon which is available for serving such a number of
human’s demands
.
Moreover
, the re- directing with no spontaneous plan seems to be
immensely
helpful when the transference towards a home- position of habitants can
significantly
decline the pressure upon the living capacity of
Megalopolitan
. It
also
creates such a
good
platform for these places several opportunities to raise the life quality up compared to city life.

To conclude
, had it not been for the deliberate concentration of city population without careful orientation during the last period, there would have been manifold
current
issues. Encouragement regarding moving to regional towns is essential to
effectively
exploit resources in
different
areas contributing to national development and decreasing the burden on the interurban area, solving a range of sophisticated problems.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
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IELTS essay People living in large cities have to face many problems in everyday life. What are those problems? Should the government encourage people to move to regional towns? v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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