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People in today's world have become too dependent on automobiles. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. " v.1

People in today's world have become too dependent on automobiles. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. " v. 1
It is sometimes believed that advertisements result in people becoming increasingly similar and that they discourage individuality. I deem that although advertising certainly does promote conformity amongst certain people, most people will always make their own choice. The role of advertising is to promote products in a way that encourages people to buy new items. Having presented a trend in the society via commence a hype in the media and engage it with positive concepts such as success and joy, this old marketing strategy, which is called marketing wave, able to line up many people to this trend. In turn, many people inevitably end up buying the same things and appearing the same. Take the Nike marketing campaign as a shining example. They always try to incline people that everybody who wants to play sports needs Nike products, as the most professional athletes use them. Consequently, most people in gyms use this brand to show that they belong to the athlete group. However, I hold that advertisement not only do not make people the same, but also it increases people's choices. Being fashionable and update is appealing to merely small folks of shoppers who are following the trends. For others, fads are might excite, but not something that should be followed religiously. As the majority of people have individual thought and taste as a product or a fashion, they hardly influenced by marketing waves. Thereby, the companies have to upgrade their product range to meet people's needs which have resulted in increasing the variety of choice for people. In the same vein, advertising presents new products for people, which they might not familiar for costumers and increases their options to choose. By way of conclusion, although fashion victims follow trends and might appear similar, they are in the minority as most people prefer to select what suit their needs and tastes. east
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
believed that advertisements result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
becoming
increasingly
similar and that they discourage individuality. I deem that although advertising
certainly
does promote conformity amongst certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
choice.

The role of advertising is to promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in a way that encourages
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
new items. Having presented a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
in the society via commence a hype in the media and engage it with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
concepts such as success and joy, this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
strategy, which
is called
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
wave, able to line up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
. In turn,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
inevitably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up buying the same things and appearing the same. Take the Nike
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
campaign as a shining example. They always try to incline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that everybody who wants to play sports needs Nike
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, as the most professional athletes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them.
Consequently
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in gyms
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this brand to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that they belong to the athlete group.

However
, I hold that advertisement not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
the same,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it increases
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's choices. Being fashionable and update is appealing to
merely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
folks of shoppers who are following the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trends
. For others, fads are might excite,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not something that should
be followed
religiously
. As the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have individual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
and taste as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
or a fashion, they hardly influenced by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
marketing
waves. Thereby, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
upgrade their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
range to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's needs which have resulted in increasing the variety of choice for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In the same vein, advertising presents new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, which they
The word 'familiar' is a noun or an adjective. A verb is missing or misspelled, or maybe a comma is missing.
might not familiar
for costumers and increases their options to choose.

By way of conclusion, although fashion victims follow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trends
and might appear similar, they are in the minority as most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to select what suit their needs and tastes.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
east
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay People in today's world have become too dependent on automobiles. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. " v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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