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Neighbors are the people who live near us. In your opinion, what type of neighbor is the best to have? -someone who is quiet-someone who we are similar to-someone who is supportive v.2

Neighbors are the people who live near us. In your opinion, what type of neighbor is the best to have? -someone who is quiet-someone who we are similar to-someone who is supportive v. 2
In the materialistic era, living standards are very common in all over the world. The living area has been upgraded by the both science and automation. However, some individuals opine that the role of the profession has decreased because of technology and science. I agree with the given statement. Therefore, the upcoming paragraph will examine the reasons. On the one hand, the trend of living sector is very popular in cities due to machinery and science. In despite of this phenomenon people liked to use equipments which have made by automation. It makes life easier. Such as in household chores. Moreover, these are sources of entertainment. To cite an example, without the entertainment gadgets life is very boring and dull. People prefer to watch televisions, using computers and smartphones. They keep on connect with others, which make good relationships with people. Hence, these are major reasons living standards have modified. On the other hand, there are many reasons why an art's role has significantly decreased. Firstly, life has become faster, which does not give time for fulfilling needs. People are become worker who does not invest time for spending to their friends and family. Another is that, people don't have an interest in painting, drawing and many more. So that's why the profession is insignificantly popular. To conclude, i would say that every coin has two facets of living sectors. So that living area has two aspects craft and technology. Technology and technique are too much popular. People should get a chance to craft, as it can be very beneficial for the schools.
In the materialistic era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standards are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common in all over the world. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
area has
been upgraded
by the both science and automation.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals opine that the role of the profession has decreased
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of technology and science. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement.
Therefore
, the upcoming paragraph will examine the reasons.

On the one hand, the trend of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
sector is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular in cities due to machinery and science. In despite of this phenomenon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
liked to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
equipments which have made by automation. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life easier. Such as in household chores.
Moreover
, these are sources of entertainment. To cite an example, without the entertainment gadgets life is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
boring and dull.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
televisions, using computers and smartphones. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
on connect with others, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
relationships with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Hence
, these are major reasons
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
standards have modified.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons why an art's role has
significantly
decreased.
Firstly
, life has become faster, which does not give time for fulfilling needs.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are become
worker who does not invest time for spending to their friends and family. Another is that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
don't have an interest in painting, drawing and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that's why the profession is
insignificantly
popular.

To conclude
,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would say that every coin has two facets of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
sectors.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
area has two aspects craft and technology. Technology and technique are too much popular.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance to craft, as it can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial for the schools.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Neighbors are the people who live near us. In your opinion, what type of neighbor is the best to have? -someone who is quiet-someone who we are similar to-someone who is supportive v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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