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People have various ways of relieving stress. What are some of the ways that you find most effective in relieving stress? Give reasons and examples to support your response. v.2

People have various ways of relieving stress. What are some of the ways that you find most effective in relieving stress? Give reasons and examples to support your response. v. 2
Since the introduction of technology, competitive environment and abrupt changes and advances would be prevailing features of the developed societies. Therefore, people’s concerns to put up with the various tastes and keep up with current trends to reach their goals would be inevitable. People based on their different characteristics and interests choose various ways to tranquil and get rid of these worries. I personally believe that physical activities and reading books are the best effective solutions. The following essay deals with the reasons supporting this point of view. Undoubtedly, exercising and being physically active contribute to a more healthy life. In fact, physical activities not only helps the body’s organs to function properly and consequently guarantee a high percentage of our physical health but also leads to feeling happy and satisfied and mental health. Therefore, a person who lives a healthy life and make a lot of attempts to enjoy his life would be capable of encountering the probable tensions and overcome them. In addition, doing exercises and especially take part in group sports play an efficient role in relieving the daily stresses. Since, conducting these activities are the best way to express the repressed thought and feelings, alleviating the worries and relax. Furthermore, reading any kinds of books varying from novels to instructive scientific books would be a good way to distract our attention from our problems. For instance, gripping stories or exciting cutting-edge information in books can be attractive enough to make us put all our attention on them and have no extra time or even free mind to think about our daily worries and difficulties. Moreover, reading more books encourage people to accustom to reading and cause learning more critical issues and broadening their horizon. And as an ideal purpose of every society, public awareness about the psychological measures to subjugate our irritating tensions and worries would be achieved. Finally, it can be concluded that according to my taste and creed, exercising and reading books are the most influential approaches to relieve harmful stresses.
Since the introduction of technology, competitive environment and abrupt
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
and advances would be prevailing features of the developed societies.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s concerns to put up with the various tastes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
up with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
trends to reach their goals would be inevitable.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
based on their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
characteristics and interests choose various ways to tranquil and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worries
. I
personally
believe that physical activities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are the best effective solutions. The following essay deals with the reasons supporting this point of view.

Undoubtedly
, exercising and being
physically
active contribute to a more healthy life. In fact, physical activities not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the body’s organs to function
properly
and
consequently
guarantee a high percentage of our physical health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
leads to feeling happy and satisfied and mental health.
Therefore
, a person who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
a healthy life and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
attempts to enjoy his life would be capable of encountering the probable tensions and overcome them.
In addition
, doing exercises and
especially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
take part
in group sports play an efficient role in relieving the daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stresses
. Since, conducting these activities are the best way to express the repressed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
and feelings, alleviating the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worries
and relax.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
any kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
varying from novels to instructive scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
would be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to distract our attention from our problems.
For instance
, gripping stories or exciting cutting-edge information in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
can be attractive
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us put all our attention on them and have no extra time or even free mind to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worries
and difficulties.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
encourage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to accustom to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
and cause learning more critical issues and broadening their horizon. And as an ideal purpose of every society, public awareness about the psychological measures to subjugate our irritating tensions and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worries
would
be achieved
.

Finally
, it can
be concluded
that according to my taste and creed, exercising and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
are the most influential approaches to relieve harmful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stresses
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay People have various ways of relieving stress. What are some of the ways that you find most effective in relieving stress? Give reasons and examples to support your response. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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