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Part of the syllabus in a history classOne of the requirements for this class is that you watch a number of films on historical topics. You will be given a list of twenty films, and you are required to watch at least twelve of the twenty films. After you v.1

Part of the syllabus in a history classOne of the requirements for this class is that you watch a number of films on historical topics. You will be given a list of twenty films, and you are required to watch at least twelve of the twenty films. After you v. 1
In the recent years, history plays an important role in our lives. Although wearing traditional dress and costumes are the way to link with the past, there is a myriad of other ways exit to help people connect with their country’s past. There are several reasons why old traditional dress will help maintain links with the past. Firstly, wearing traditional dress represents the cultural rituals, beliefs, and values which passed from one generation to another generation. For example, in Vietnam, most of female students wear Ao Dai as uniform, this shows not only the traditional beauty but also patriotism of them. Secondly, as wear traditional costumes, citizens can reminisce about the past and be proud of it. In order words, wearing traditional costumes related to certain religious events to give people a chance to connect with the country’s past customs and rituals. However, there are some other factors to which interrelate with the past of the country. First, museums and art galleries which including heritages, paintings and messages. This can be useful for people to visualise and comprehend on how people in the past used to live. Second, folk music illustrates the story of life of group people and it represents when containing ancient languages. This means that it will provide larger space for modern people to imagine the life of people in the past more effective than costumes. In conclusion, These are many ways we can connect with the past, but traditional costumes are one of the essential ways. All ways should be respected and reviewed.
In the recent years, history plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Although wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
dress and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costumes
are the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to link with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
, there is a myriad of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
exit to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
connect with their country’s past.

There are several reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
dress will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
maintain links with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
.
Firstly
, wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
dress represents the cultural rituals, beliefs, and values which passed from one generation to another generation.
For example
, in Vietnam, most of female students wear
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ao
Possible spelling mistake found.
Dai
as uniform, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
beauty
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
patriotism of them.
Secondly
, as wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costumes
, citizens can reminisce about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
and be proud of it. In order words, wearing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costumes
related to certain religious
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
to give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
a chance to connect with the country’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
customs and rituals.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other factors to which interrelate with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
of the country.
First
, museums and art galleries which including heritages, paintings and messages. This can be useful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
Possible spelling mistake. 'visualise' is British English.
visualise
and comprehend on how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. Second, folk music illustrates the story of life of group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and it represents when containing ancient languages. This means that it will provide larger space for modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to imagine the life of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
more effective than costumes.

In conclusion
, These are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
we can connect with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costumes
are one of the essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
. All
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
should
be respected
and reviewed.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Part of the syllabus in a history classOne of the requirements for this class is that you watch a number of films on historical topics. You will be given a list of twenty films, and you are required to watch at least twelve of the twenty films. After you v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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