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Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest way that the governments and individuals can tackle these problem. v.30

Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest way that the governments and individuals can tackle these problem. v. 30
It is certainly that dramatic considerable increasing the urban population leads to serious problems. There are several reasons for this problem, and various measures can be taken by the government and individuals to improve the situation. Overpopulation in town brings people some drawbacks. Firstly, one of the major problems that is environmental pollution. Obviously, the city is storing a large quality of the wastes from people. For instance, due to the huge number of living in the city; therefore, the amount of food consumption is higher than others provinces. Secondly, growing population causes resemblance to the unemployment rate. To illustrate, there is a tendency for young people to migrate into Hanoi; thus, it is imbalance the supply of employment. There is some solution to improving these problems. The government plays a vital role in reducing in joblessness. Nowadays, over million people are being out of work; consequently, the government should provide policies and physical conditions for developing others place with a goal as creating jobs. Furthermore, people have to prepare yourself better skills in opportunities looking for a job. In addition, people should be educated about green life when they stay in town. For example, people need to limit wastes into the environment by the way recycles them. In conclusion, overpopulation of large town makes low economic growth and a low standard of living; nevertheless, these problems can be tackled with the support from the government developing economies in others areas to going down the percentage of unemployment. Besides, reducing population in urban helps us to protect the environment.
It is
certainly
that dramatic considerable increasing the urban population leads to serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. There are several reasons for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
, and various measures can
be taken
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and individuals to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the situation.

Overpopulation in town brings
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks.
Firstly
, one of the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
that is
environmental pollution.
Obviously
, the city is storing a large quality of the wastes from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For instance
, due to the huge number of living in the city;
therefore
, the amount of food consumption is higher than others provinces.
Secondly
, growing population causes resemblance to the unemployment rate. To illustrate, there is a tendency for young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to migrate into Hanoi;
thus
, it is imbalance the supply of employment.

There is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solution to improving these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
plays a vital role
Adverb repetition. Please, verify.
in reducing in
joblessness. Nowadays, over million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are being out of work;
consequently
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should provide policies and physical conditions for developing others place with a goal as creating jobs.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
prepare yourself better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in opportunities looking for a job.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
be educated
about green life when they stay in town.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
need to limit wastes into the environment by the way recycles them.

In conclusion
, overpopulation of large town
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
low economic growth and a low standard of living;
nevertheless
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
can
be tackled
with the support from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
developing economies in others areas to going down the percentage of unemployment.
Besides
, reducing population in urban
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us to protect the environment.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest way that the governments and individuals can tackle these problem. v. 30

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 9.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 9.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 9.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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