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Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems v.20

Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems v. 20
The tremendous increase in population in urban locales has led to a lot of hassles. This essay will discuss two of the main problems which are caused by overpopulation. This essay will also suggest various controls that the government can undertake to solve the aforementioned issues. Living in congested households and unemployment is two serious issues caused by overpopulation. While people are increasing, there is now new land that is being produced, the quantum of land is still limited. In addition to that, because of all people wanting to provide for their families there is only a limited set of jobs available in the market. For example, there are areas in Mumbai, which have more than 6 people living, whereas only 2 were supposed to be residing there. Furthermore, companies have a fixed number of jobs that they can offer. But because of the excess in population, 63% of Indian populace are unemployed. This results in people adjusting a lot more within a limited area and the rise in unequal earning opportunities. However, the government and individuals can turn to certain measures that allow them to get the situation under control such as, limiting the number of migrants into the city and individuals owning private businesses creating more jobs. If the amount of migrants is curbed from entering the city, there will be lesser people living in small enclosed spaces. Whereas Individuals owning factories can hire more manpower creating more opportunities for the people. For example, Mumbai should allow only 5 people a month into the city and factory owners should hire a minimum of 5 workers a month based on their profits. In conclusion, while overpopulation is a matter of concern necessary steps need to be taken in order to solve it. This essay discussed two problems linked to the increase in the number of people and also provided solutions for the same.
The tremendous increase in population in urban locales has led to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
hassles. This essay will discuss two of the main problems which
are caused
by overpopulation. This essay will
also
suggest various controls that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can undertake to solve the aforementioned issues.

Living in congested households and unemployment is two serious issues caused by overpopulation. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are increasing, there is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
new land
that is
being produced
, the quantum of land is
still
limited.
In addition
to that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
wanting to provide for their families there is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a limited set of jobs available in the market.
For example
, there are areas in Mumbai, which have more than 6
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living, whereas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2
were supposed
to be residing there.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
number of jobs that they can offer.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the excess in population, 63% of Indian populace
are unemployed
. This results in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
adjusting a lot more within a limited area and the rise in unequal earning opportunities.

However
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and individuals can turn to certain measures that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the situation under control such as, limiting the number of migrants into the city and individuals owning private businesses creating more jobs. If the amount of migrants
is curbed
from entering the city, there will be lesser
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
enclosed spaces. Whereas Individuals owning factories can hire more manpower creating more opportunities for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, Mumbai should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
a month into the city and factory owners should hire a minimum of 5 workers a month based on their profits.

In conclusion
, while overpopulation is a matter of concern necessary steps need to
be taken
in order to solve it. This essay discussed two problems linked to the increase in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
also
provided solutions for the same.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
With languages, you are at home anywhere.
Edward De Waal

IELTS essay Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems v. 20

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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