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Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems. v.15

People are facing tremendous bad situations due to an overcrowded population in the cities and towns. It makes serious issues among them. This phenomenon may have perpetuated owing umpteen reasons and hence seek multifarious solutions to further deterioration. To embark with a host of reasons responsible for this occurrence, firstly, having an excess number of people lead to buy more cruisers which blow more pollution and creates a high level of risk in the environment. As a result, people have become more often sick. Secondly, not only this but people also have gotten traffic jam problem due to the same reason as uncountable cars on the road and frustrated the people by stuck in the cue for a long time. For example – It has been proved by market research that pupils who live in a rural area become more hale than those situated in the urban. This relevant panacea to resolve this would be the Government that they must aware the citizens to how adverse repercussion of air pollution is detrimental for their lives. The government foster people to board a public transport which assists to make people healthier and also lessen the pollution and rush. Probing further to a solution by an individual is that it is a public onus to only use the personal vehicle either when it is a necessity or going with family at least two persons in the room. Both air pollution and traffic problem could be resolved if people start following the rule. At the end, recapitulating the whole concept, I would like to conclude by saying that issues such as pollution and roadblocks become getting worst day by day and war footing can be tackled by the Governments and individuals effort.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are facing tremendous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
situations due to an overcrowded population in the cities and towns. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
serious issues among them. This phenomenon may have perpetuated owing umpteen reasons and
hence
seek multifarious solutions to
further
deterioration.

To embark with a host of reasons responsible for this occurrence,
firstly
, having an excess number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
more cruisers which blow more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and creates a high level of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
in the environment.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have become more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
sick.
Secondly
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
have gotten traffic jam problem due to the same reason as uncountable cars on the road and frustrated the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by stuck in the cue for a long time.
For example
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
It has
been proved
by market research that pupils who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a rural area become more hale than those situated in the urban.

This relevant panacea to resolve this would be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
that they
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
must aware
the citizens to how adverse repercussion of air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is detrimental for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
foster
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to board a public transport which assists to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
healthier and
also
lessen the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and rush.

Probing
further
to a solution by an individual is that it is a public onus to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the personal vehicle either when it is a necessity or going with family at least two persons in the room. Both air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and traffic problem could
be resolved
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
following the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
.

At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, recapitulating the whole concept, I would like
to conclude
by saying that issues such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and roadblocks become getting
A determiner is probably missing here: “the worst”.
worst
day by day and war footing can
be tackled
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
and individuals effort.
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IELTS essay Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious ones and suggest ways that governments and individuals can tackle these problems.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
289 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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