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Over the past fifty years, international sports events such as Olympic games and world cup competition have played an increasing important role in our society. However, many people think such events are an enormous waste of money, time and effort. Do you agree? v.1

Over the past fifty years, international sports events such as Olympic games and world cup competition have played an increasing important role in our society. However, many people think such events are an enormous waste of money, time and effort. Do you agree? v. 1
TO BE HEALTHY, SOME PHYSICAL ACTIVITY IS NEEDED AND THE BEST WAY TO MAINTAIN FITNESS IS THE PLAYING SPORT. SINCE HALF OF A CENTURY, WORLD CUP AND OLYMPIC GAMES ARE BECOMING MORE POPULAR DAY BY DAY. NIETHHELESS, SOME FOLKS ARGUE THAT THIS KIND OF COMPETITIONS REQUIRE A GREAT AMOUNT OF BUCKS AND TIME TO MAKE THE EVENT SUCCESSFUL. FIRSTLY, THIS ESSAY WILL DISCUSS ABOUT WHY IT UNUSEFUL TO SPEND THE CURRENCY AND TIME FOR SUCH EVENT AND SECONDLY, WHERE THIS BUCKS SHOULD BE SPENT ON SUCH AS HEALTH CARE, ARMY AND SO ON. TO START WITH, THIS TYPE OF COMPETITIONS ARE TEND TO CREAT A ENVIROMWNTAL PROBLEMS SUCH AS DUE TO TRASH THROWEN BY AUDIENCE. AS A CONSEQUENCE, GARABAGES INCREASE AND THERE WILL BE NO PLACE FOR IT TO DISTROY WHICH IS NOT AFFORDABLE APART FORM EVENT EXPENSES. THUS, IT WOULD AFFECT THE NATION'S ECONOMY. FOR EXAMPLE, TRASH DATA OF THE USA REVEALED THAT 70% OF THE WATSE ARE COMING FROM THE SPORT GROUND WHERE THE HUGE EVENTS OCCOURED. HENCE, THIS CAN BE THE ONE OF THE REASON WHY PEOPLE THINK SO. ON THE SOLUTION SIDE, I BELIEVE, THE MONEY SHOULD BE SPENT TO MAKE A BETTER HEALTH CARE SYSTEM. THIS DECREASE THE BURDEN ON THE INDIVIDUALS WHO ARE IN NEED AND GOVERNMENT AS WELL. HENCE, THE FUTURE ECONOMY WOULD BOOST AND PEOPLE CAN OBTAIN ENORMOUS BENEFITS AS GOVERNMENT WOULD HAVE ENLUGH MONEY TO MEET THE CIVILIAN'S DEMAND. FOR INSTANCE, CANADA'S SPORT DEPARTMENT SECTOR FOUND THAT 40% OF THE MONEY FROM SUCH HUGE EVENTS COULD BE BENEFIACIAL TO MAKE EXCELLENT HEALTH CARE FACILITIES. HOWEVER. A FOREIGN LEVEL COMPETITION INDEED PROVIED A ENTERTAINMENT TO THE PUBLIC, ACCORDING TO ME, IT SHOULD HAVE SOME LIMITATIONS ON BUDGET SO THAT IT CAN BE INVESTED FOR THE INDEED FOLKS. IN CONCLUSION, INTERNATIONS EVENTS CREATS A BOTH POSITIVE AND NEGATIVE IMPACT, HENCE IT IS INDIVIDUAL AND GOVERNMENT'S RESPONSIBILITY TO DECIDE THE WISE DECISION AND PROCEED WITH THE ACTIONS, THEN SURELY FOLKS THINKING WILL CHANGE.
TO BE HEALTHY,
SOME
PHYSICAL ACTIVITY
IS NEEDED
AND THE BEST WAY TO MAINTAIN FITNESS IS THE PLAYING SPORT. SINCE HALF OF A CENTURY, WORLD CUP AND OLYMPIC GAMES ARE BECOMING MORE POPULAR DAY BY DAY.
NIETHHELESS
,
SOME
FOLKS ARGUE THAT THIS KIND OF COMPETITIONS REQUIRE A GREAT AMOUNT OF BUCKS AND TIME TO
MAKE
THE
EVENT
SUCCESSFUL.
FIRSTLY
, THIS ESSAY WILL
DISCUSS ABOUT WHY
IT UNUSEFUL TO SPEND THE CURRENCY AND TIME FOR SUCH
EVENT
AND
SECONDLY
, WHERE
THIS
BUCKS SHOULD
BE SPENT
ON SUCH AS HEALTH CARE, ARMY AND
SO
ON.

TO
START
WITH, THIS TYPE OF COMPETITIONS ARE
TEND
TO
CREAT
A
ENVIROMWNTAL
PROBLEMS SUCH AS DUE TO TRASH
THROWEN
BY AUDIENCE. AS A CONSEQUENCE,
GARABAGES
INCREASE AND THERE WILL BE NO PLACE FOR IT TO
DISTROY
WHICH IS NOT AFFORDABLE
APART FORM
EVENT
EXPENSES.
THUS
, IT WOULD AFFECT THE NATION'S ECONOMY.
FOR EXAMPLE
, TRASH DATA OF THE USA REVEALED THAT 70% OF THE
WATSE
ARE COMING FROM THE SPORT GROUND WHERE THE HUGE
EVENTS
OCCOURED
.
HENCE
, THIS CAN BE THE ONE OF THE REASON WHY
PEOPLE
THINK
SO
.

ON THE SOLUTION SIDE, I BELIEVE, THE MONEY SHOULD
BE SPENT
TO
MAKE
A BETTER HEALTH CARE SYSTEM. THIS DECREASE THE BURDEN ON THE INDIVIDUALS WHO ARE IN NEED AND
GOVERNMENT
AS WELL
.
HENCE
, THE FUTURE ECONOMY WOULD BOOST AND
PEOPLE
CAN OBTAIN ENORMOUS BENEFITS AS
GOVERNMENT
WOULD HAVE
ENLUGH
MONEY TO
MEET
THE CIVILIAN'S DEMAND.
FOR INSTANCE
, CANADA'S SPORT DEPARTMENT SECTOR FOUND THAT 40% OF THE MONEY FROM SUCH HUGE
EVENTS
COULD BE
BENEFIACIAL
TO
MAKE
EXCELLENT HEALTH CARE FACILITIES.

HOWEVER
. A FOREIGN LEVEL COMPETITION
INDEED
PROVIED
A ENTERTAINMENT TO THE PUBLIC, ACCORDING TO ME, IT SHOULD HAVE
SOME
LIMITATIONS ON BUDGET
SO
THAT IT CAN
BE INVESTED
FOR THE
INDEED
FOLKS.

IN CONCLUSION
,
INTERNATIONS
EVENTS
CREATS
A BOTH
POSITIVE
AND
NEGATIVE
IMPACT,
HENCE
IT IS INDIVIDUAL AND
GOVERNMENT
'S RESPONSIBILITY TO DECIDE THE WISE DECISION AND PROCEED WITH THE ACTIONS, THEN
SURELY
FOLKS THINKING WILL
CHANGE
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Over the past fifty years, international sports events such as Olympic games and world cup competition have played an increasing important role in our society. However, many people think such events are an enormous waste of money, time and effort. Do you agree? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
329 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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