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Nowadays, the increasing amount of garbage (Waste) is a real concern. Why is this happening? What can be done to resolve this? v.2

Nowadays, the increasing amount of garbage (Waste) is a real concern. Why is this happening? What can be done to resolve this? v. 2
These days, the problem of proliferation of rubbish across the world has reached at an alarming stage which needs immediate attention. The main reasons for this are related to higher rates of population growth and purchasing power abilities of individuals that could be controlled by the implementation of some refined policies by the authorities. To embark upon, the first major cause for the accumulation of wastage is the faster pace of multiplication rate of human beings which has attained a number of six billion. This is putting a lot of pressure on the natural resources of the earth by using more from these sources and producing numerous items required by everybody in their daily routine life. However, we humans are returning these items in the form of garbage to nature which is contaminating the whole environment and humanity as well. To tackle this issue, governments should try to control the population levels in order to curtail the consumption of unnecessary goods by society. As a result of less usage, the lower will be the wastage. Another reason is the elevated levels of per capita income. In other words, now, people have more tendencies to purchase a wide varieties of things such as packaged foods, luxury items and so on. All of these items are wrapped in cardboards, thermocols or plastic bags which the people usually throw outside their homes or in a common dumping place. To resolve this in a better way, companies should limit the use of these unnecessary wrapping materials; moreover, they should recycle these at their own levels. Consequently, there would be an overall reduction in the percentage of such kinds of wastes in open spaces. In conclusion, the issue of increasing garbage material on our planet arose due to population burst and high-income levels that could be resolved by joint efforts of individuals, governments and private factories.
These days, the problem of proliferation of rubbish across the world has reached at an alarming stage which needs immediate attention. The main reasons for this
are related
to higher rates of population growth and purchasing power abilities of individuals that could
be controlled
by the implementation of
some
refined policies by the authorities.

To embark upon, the
first
major cause for the accumulation of wastage is the faster pace of multiplication rate of human beings which has attained a number of six billion. This is putting
a lot of
pressure on the natural resources of the earth by using more from these sources and producing numerous
items
required by everybody in their daily routine life.
However
, we humans are returning these
items
in the form of garbage to nature which is contaminating the whole environment and humanity
as well
. To tackle this issue,
governments
should try to control the population
levels
in order to curtail the consumption of unnecessary
goods
by society.
As a result
of less usage, the lower will be the wastage.

Another reason is the elevated
levels
of per capita income.
In other words
,
now
,
people
have more tendencies to
purchase
a wide
varieties
of things such as packaged foods, luxury
items
and
so
on. All of these
items
are wrapped
in
cardboards
,
thermocols
or plastic bags which the
people
usually
throw outside their homes or in a common dumping place. To resolve this in a better way,
companies
should limit the
use
of these unnecessary wrapping materials;
moreover
, they should recycle these at their
own
levels
.
Consequently
, there would be an
overall
reduction in the percentage of such kinds of wastes in open spaces.

In conclusion
, the issue of increasing garbage material on our planet arose due to population burst and high-income
levels
that could
be resolved
by joint efforts of individuals,
governments
and private factories.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, the increasing amount of garbage (Waste) is a real concern. Why is this happening? What can be done to resolve this? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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