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Do you agree or disagree with the following paragraphs? Most advertisements make products seems much better than they really are. v.3

Most advertisements make products seems much better than they really are. v. 3
As humans living in a civilized society, the demand for more production increased; based on this decrement, the requirement for the advertisements’ enhances. As a result, the advertisements have an indubitable status in marketing. The advertisement and its accuracy have always been a controversial issue among the many people. While, some people may hold a view that they present the valid information data about the products; however, others may take an opposite viewpoint and believe that the commercial provides fake information to attempt the consumers. I personally agree with the second belief. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most outstanding reasons, which persuade me to put forward this perspective. The first reason which gives adherence to my outlook is that the producers do not list the valid data about their products. Indeed, since the producers' aim of advertisement is to flourished sell; as a result, they do not provide the accurate information about their producers' failures. Even in a case, the put emphasizes on the merits of their products. Consequently, the advertisement company, which prepares the commercial based on this unfair, the ultimate message released by the company, is completely far away from the actual products. A vivid example can be given to shed a light on the accuracy of this issue, is the example of the sock' s company in my country. This company annually lists statistic about their production and the socks modern designs and colors; in contrast, it does provide no data about the socks' disabilities. Last year, the novel commercial about this company and its socks broadcasts in the media. The majority of people, who are deceived by its advertisement about the colorful pattern, purchase this product; however, after a while, there was a scandal about its failure in the resistance. Thus, this company just presents its advantages to impel the people, and the advertisements prepare this condition for the company. The next reason embraced my idea is that the advertisement is shaped in the base of exaggeration. This exaggeration can be categorized in the two separate fields of claims and visuals. For instance, the vague acclaims such as the best, the unique taste, can easily persuade the consumers that product is the ultimate best option. However, it is solely a holistic, ambiguous phrase. If it is the best product, what characteristics make it best? Or, based on which comparison this product is nominated as the best product. About the visual overestimation, most of the posters and pictures depicted the products are modified by the software such as photos hopes. As a result, there is a huge gap between the real products and their advertisement. According to the noteworthy, intelligent survey conducted in my country, approximately sixty-nine percent of the pictures of chocolate commercials are edited by the photo shops. To wrap it up, based on the all aforementioned reasons, one can logically draw the conclusion that the advertisement does not illustrate the realistic outline of the product. Since the company disguises the advertisement companies; in addition, the advertisement company exaggerates in their tasks. All in all, I firmly recommend that there should be a cogent observation in the whole process of advertisements, till the advertisement shows the accurate message of the products.
As humans living in a civilized society, the demand for more production increased; based on this decrement, the requirement for the
advertisements’
enhances.
As a result
, the
advertisements
have an indubitable status in marketing. The
advertisement
and its accuracy have always been a controversial issue among the
many
people
. While,
some
people
may hold a view that they present the valid information data about the
products
;
however
, others may take an opposite viewpoint and believe that the
commercial
provides fake information to attempt the consumers. I
personally
agree
with the second belief. In the following paragraphs, I will delve into the most outstanding
reasons
, which persuade me to put forward this perspective.

The
first
reason
which gives adherence to my outlook is that the producers do not list the valid data about their
products
.
Indeed
, since the
producers&
#039; aim of
advertisement
is to flourished sell;
as a result
, they do not provide the accurate information about their
producers&
#039; failures. Even in a case, the put emphasizes on the merits of their
products
.
Consequently
, the
advertisement
company
, which prepares the
commercial
based on this unfair, the ultimate message released by the
company
, is completely far away from the actual
products
. A vivid example can be
given
to shed a light on the accuracy of this issue, is the example of the
sock&
#039; s
company
in my country. This
company
annually
lists statistic about their production and the
socks
modern designs and colors;
in contrast
, it does provide no data about the
socks&
#039; disabilities. Last year, the novel
commercial
about this
company
and its
socks
broadcasts in the media. The majority of
people
, who
are deceived
by its
advertisement
about the colorful pattern,
purchase
this
product
;
however
, after a while, there was a scandal about its failure in the resistance.
Thus
, this
company
just
presents its advantages to impel the
people
, and the
advertisements
prepare this condition for the
company
.

The
next
reason
embraced my
idea
is that the
advertisement
is shaped
in the base of exaggeration. This exaggeration can
be categorized
in the two separate fields of claims and visuals.
For instance
, the vague acclaims such as the
best
, the unique taste, can
easily
persuade the consumers that
product
is the ultimate
best
option.
However
, it is
solely
a holistic, ambiguous phrase. If it is the
best
product
, what characteristics
make
it
best
? Or, based on which comparison this
product
is nominated
as the
best
product
. About the visual overestimation, most of the posters and pictures depicted the
products
are modified
by the software such as photos hopes.
As a result
, there is a huge gap between the real
products
and their
advertisement
. According to the noteworthy, intelligent survey conducted in my country, approximately sixty-nine percent of the pictures of chocolate commercials
are edited
by the photo shops.

To wrap it up, based on the all aforementioned
reasons
, one can
logically
draw the conclusion that the
advertisement
does not illustrate the realistic outline of the
product
. Since the
company
disguises the
advertisement
companies
;
in addition
, the
advertisement
company
exaggerates in their tasks. All in all, I
firmly
recommend that there should be a cogent observation in the whole process of
advertisements
, till the
advertisement
shows
the accurate message of the
products
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
56Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Most advertisements make products seems much better than they really are. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
540 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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