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Nowadays people live in a society where consumer goods are relatively cheaper to buy. Do you think the advantages far outweigh its disadvantages? v.1

Nowadays people live in a society where consumer goods are relatively cheaper to buy. Do you think the advantages far outweigh its disadvantages? v. 1
There is no doubt that these days consumer goods are economical to purchase in the society people live in. Although buying various items on low prices has a few drawbacks, I believe it has many merits, such as accessibility to all and easy to replace the goods. One of the main disadvantages of purchasing goods on economical price is over-purchasing. For example, it has been observed that people end up buying even those things which they do not really need, just due to their low prices. This causes over-spending their hard-earned money resulting in fewer savings and cluttering their homes with unwanted items. Availability of low-priced consumption goods has several benefits. Firstly, due to their economical price, each and every person usually have access to them. In other words, such items are affordable to all irrespective of their social status. For instance, unlike past, home appliances, such as food factory, are now inexpensive due to the presence of a variety of manufacturers, thus they could be bought at an economical price. Secondly, replacing items, nowadays, are now easier than in the past. To illustrate, if a piece of furniture gets damaged, people often try to replace it with a new one, rather than getting it repaired. Such human behaviour has now been possible due to having access to cheap price consumer goods. In conclusion, in my opinion, regardless of the drawbacks, access to low-priced goods in today's society has numerous benefits, to which affordability and is ease of replacement are a few to mention. Nevertheless, it is recommended that people try not to over-spend their money on the items that are useless for them, so that others who are actually in need of those things, could be benefited.
There is no doubt that these days consumer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economical
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
in the society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in. Although buying various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
on low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
has a few drawbacks, I believe it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
merits, such as accessibility to all and easy to replace the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.

One of the main disadvantages of purchasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
is over-purchasing.
For example
, it has
been observed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up buying even those things which they do not
really
need,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to their low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prices
. This causes over-spending their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
-earned money resulting in fewer savings and cluttering their homes with unwanted items.

Availability of low-priced consumption
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
has several benefits.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
, each and every person
usually
have access to them.
In other words
, such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
are affordable to all irrespective of their social status.
For instance
, unlike past, home appliances, such as food factory, are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
inexpensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the presence of a variety of manufacturers,
thus
they could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
at an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economical
price.

Secondly
, replacing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
, nowadays, are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
easier than in the past. To illustrate, if a piece of furniture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
damaged,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
try to replace it with a new one,
rather
than getting it repaired. Such human
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
been possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to having access to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
consumer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.

In conclusion
, in my opinion, regardless of the drawbacks, access to low-priced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
goods
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's society has numerous benefits, to which affordability and is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
of replacement are a few to mention.
Nevertheless
, it
is recommended
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
try not to over-spend their money on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
that are useless for them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that others who are actually in need of those things, could
be benefited
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays people live in a society where consumer goods are relatively cheaper to buy. Do you think the advantages far outweigh its disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
288 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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