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Nowadays, people have greater access to fast food. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

Nowadays, people have greater access to fast food. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
Fast food has become so popular in recent times. It is available to all kinds of individuals. However, it brings more drawbacks than the advantages, which will be discussed in this essay. To commence with, there are a few positive aspects of having access to the junk food. Firstly, it requires limited time to prepare. Most people, especially working professionals, do not have the privilege to cook a proper meal due to their hectic schedule, therefore, they depend on the food items, which can be cooked faster. For instance, most of the employees prefer to have noodles or pasta for their breakfast instead of eating healthy. Secondly, more fast food centres are available throughout the cities, which are accessible to people if they want to have a snack. They also provide a variety of options that attract people and become addicted to their taste instead of comfort food. In contrast, the fast food brings more complications than benefits. It is one of the main reasons for health issues caused in the young people. The digestion problems ranked to be the biggest problem when spicy food is consumed. It also causes weakness in the individuals as they lack proteins from not following a nutritious diet. Moreover, the teenagers gain weight and have cholesterol issues if they have junk food regularly. This affects them to be less productive. In short, people are paying to have junk food like burgers and pizzas, only to suffer from health troubles later. In conclusion, although people can effortlessly make unhealthy food, it has its own limitations, as it costs their health. I believe that the disadvantages outweigh more than the advantages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
popular in recent times. It is available to all kinds of individuals.
However
, it brings more drawbacks than the advantages, which will
be discussed
in this essay.

To commence with, there are a few
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspects of having access to the junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Firstly
, it requires limited time to prepare. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
working professionals, do not have the privilege to cook a proper meal due to their hectic schedule,
therefore
, they depend on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items, which can
be cooked
faster.
For instance
, most of the employees prefer to have noodles or pasta for their breakfast
instead
of eating healthy.
Secondly
, more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
are available throughout the cities, which are accessible to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
if they want to have a snack. They
also
provide a variety of options that attract
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and become addicted to their taste
instead
of comfort food.

In contrast
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
brings more complications than benefits. It is one of the main reasons for health issues caused in the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The digestion problems ranked to be the biggest problem when spicy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is consumed
. It
also
causes weakness in the individuals as they lack proteins from not following a nutritious diet.
Moreover
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
gain weight and have cholesterol issues if they have junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
regularly
. This affects them to be less productive. In short,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are paying to have junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
like burgers and pizzas,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to suffer from health troubles later.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
effortlessly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, it has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
limitations, as it costs their health. I believe that the disadvantages outweigh more than the advantages.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, people have greater access to fast food. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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