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Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects in university in many countries. What are the reasons for this problem? What are the effects on the society? v.5

Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects in university in many countries. What are the reasons for this problem? What are the effects on the society? v. 5
Science is a subject which is always progressing every day. In recent times not many students are opting to study it in their respective universities across different nations. This essay will help identify the reasons for this and point out the effects of the same society. Science is comparatively tougher than other educational streams. It is the vastness of the subject and it is advancing on a daily basis because of which not many prefer to pursue it. Because of that, there is no fixed syllabus that students can follow and be content with. For example, many want to pursue it, after realising the struggle very few manage to begin the journey. However, this also has an effect on our surroundings were less makes more. Since the numbers choosing Science are few, the value of people pursuing is on a great high. As a rule of thumb, the people have more value, can earn more in the future and are distinct from the other's not pursuing science. For example, whether it's an astronaut or a Doctor, these professions make a huge difference from a societal point of view. Tougher educational streams have a tough time having people who willingly opt for it out sheer passion. This essay explained why we need more people to strike a balance in society and how there needs to be a point of stoppage when it comes to science. In my opinion, to have a more diversified outlook towards the future, universities should include one Science subject across all streams.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
is a subject which is always progressing every day. In recent times not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students are opting to study it in their respective universities across
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
identify the reasons for this and point out the effects of the same society.

Science is
comparatively
tougher than other educational streams. It is the vastness of the subject and it is advancing on a daily basis
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
prefer to pursue it.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of that, there is no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
syllabus that students can follow and be content with.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
want to pursue it, after
Possible spelling mistake. 'realising' is British English.
realising
the struggle
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Possible agreement error. The noun manage seems to be uncountable; consider using: "little manage".
few manage
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
the journey.

However
, this
also
has an effect on our surroundings were
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun makes is countable.
less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
more. Since the numbers choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
are few, the value of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
pursuing is on a great high. As a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
of thumb, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have more value, can earn more in the future and are distinct from the other's not pursuing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
.
For example
, whether it's an astronaut or a Doctor, these professions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a huge difference from a societal point of view.

Tougher educational streams have a tough time having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
willingly
opt for it out sheer passion. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
why we need more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to strike a balance in society and how there needs to be a point of stoppage when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
. In my opinion, to have a more diversified outlook towards the future, universities should include one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
subject across all streams.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Nowadays, not enough students choose science subjects in university in many countries. What are the reasons for this problem? What are the effects on the society? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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