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Nowadays, most people are not as fit and active as they were in the past. What are the main causes of this situation? Suggest some possible solutions v.10

Nowadays, most people are not as fit and active as they were in the past. What are the main causes of this situation? Suggest some possible solutions v. 10
There is no doubt that the role of being physically adept and active plays a crucial role in people's lives. However, in recent years, most of the individuals have not been fitted compared to people from the past century. This essay, therefore, will explore a couple of reasons that might cause this above-mentioned situation and highlight pertinent measurements accordingly. First and foremost, many urban and sub-urban residents have been leading a comfortable life, whereas their ancestors had to engage in manual activities to meet the basic necessities, following the hand-to-mouth strategy. This is indeed unfortunate cause the technological disruption has erased the scope to involve in productive activities not only mentally, but also physically. To give an illustrative example, a recent Harvard University study revealed that a myriad automated sewing machine have curtailed South Asian garment workers' manual working hours by almost half in the last decade. So, formal organisations ought to mandate a particular hour of exercise or so that public and private employees are bound to follow in order to keep themselves fit. Another concern is that a number of citizens are getting addicted to their electronic gadgets, which are demotivating outdoor activities. This is because many popular games, such as football, cricket, and so forth used to be the primary source of entertainment and now the recreational sector has been captured by technology companies. For instance, many professional players are strictly prohibited to use their smartphones during any series or campaign because of their much-needed concentration on the game. Thus, a culture of rules and regulations in a community would force people to revamp their tech-based mentality. In conclusion, numerous people are getting used to their safe and enjoyable life, which is even limited to, electronic devices and this attitude has been gearing towards the unhealthy lifestyle and more health complications. This is why strict policies, both from institutions and communities might trigger some fruitful outcomes for this generation.
There is no doubt that the role of being
physically
adept and active plays a crucial role in
people
's
lives
.
However
, in recent years, most of the individuals have not
been fitted
compared to
people
from the past century. This essay,
therefore
, will explore a couple of reasons that might cause this above-mentioned situation and highlight pertinent measurements
accordingly
.

First
and foremost,
many
urban and sub-urban residents have been leading a comfortable life, whereas their ancestors had to engage in manual activities to
meet
the
basic necessities
, following the hand-to-mouth strategy. This is
indeed
unfortunate cause the technological disruption has erased the scope to involve in productive activities not
only
mentally,
but
also
physically
. To give an illustrative example, a recent Harvard University study revealed that a myriad automated sewing machine have curtailed South Asian garment workers' manual working hours by almost half in the last decade.
So
, formal
organisations
ought to mandate a particular hour of exercise or
so
that public and private employees
are bound
to follow in order to
keep
themselves fit.

Another concern is that a number of citizens are getting addicted to their electronic gadgets, which are demotivating outdoor activities. This is
because
many
popular games, such as football, cricket, and
so
forth
used
to be the primary source of entertainment and
now
the recreational sector has
been captured
by technology
companies
.
For instance
,
many
professional players are
strictly
prohibited to
use
their smartphones during any series or campaign
because
of their much-needed concentration on the game.
Thus
, a culture of
rules
and regulations in a community would force
people
to revamp their tech-based mentality.

In conclusion
, numerous
people
are getting
used
to their safe and enjoyable life, which is even limited to, electronic devices and this attitude has been gearing towards the unhealthy lifestyle and more health complications. This is why strict policies, both from institutions and communities might trigger
some
fruitful outcomes for this generation.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
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IELTS essay Nowadays, most people are not as fit and active as they were in the past. What are the main causes of this situation? Suggest some possible solutions v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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