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Nowadays more and more business meetings and business trainings are taking place online. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? v.3

Nowadays more and more business meetings and business trainings are taking place online. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3
It is true that, along with the development of technology I recent decades, the number of online meeting and training business has increased. Although, there are negative consequences of this development, I would argue that the advantages of this object are more than drawbacks. Two of the most benefits of online meeting have mentioned as follow. Firstly, individuals will not have need to go out home for reaching to the workplace in order to attend in meeting. As a result of this is that, people can save in time, and they will have opportunity so as to program another activity. Secondly, individuals usually use from personal car for going to the workplace. This subject might lead to the heavy traffics specially in large cities. One result of this is, increasing pollution driven from emission toxic fumes of vehicles exhaust that cause deleterious problem for people healthy. However, this technology may cause some problems for individuals. Lack of face to face communication particularly in meeting business may be caused that some problem remind unresolved. For example, about the performance a new project in company, it needs to presentation a lot of documents and data that in online meeting there is not such possible. Likewise, about the training business, since there is not possible to reply to tutor question, therefore it may be not benefit sufficiently as the same as present classes. In summarize, despite the fact that online meeting has some drawbacks, however I believe that the benefits of using this development is greater.
It is true that, along with the development of technology I recent decades, the number of
online
meeting
and training business has increased. Although, there are
negative
consequences of this development, I would argue that the advantages of this object are more than drawbacks.

Two of the most benefits of
online
meeting
have mentioned
as follow
.
Firstly
, individuals will not have need to go out home for reaching to the workplace in order to attend in
meeting
.
As a result
of this is that,
people
can save in time, and they will have opportunity
so as to
program another activity.
Secondly
, individuals
usually
use
from personal car for going to the workplace. This subject might lead to the heavy traffics
specially
in large cities. One result of this is, increasing pollution driven from emission toxic fumes of vehicles exhaust that cause deleterious problem for
people
healthy.

However
, this technology may cause
some
problems for individuals. Lack of face to face communication
particularly
in
meeting
business may
be caused
that
some
problem
remind unresolved.
For example
, about the performance a new project in
company
, it needs to presentation
a lot of
documents and data that in
online
meeting
there is not such possible.
Likewise
, about the training business, since there is not possible to reply to tutor question,
therefore
it may be not
benefit
sufficiently
as the same as present classes.

In summarize, despite the fact that
online
meeting
has
some
drawbacks,
however
I believe that the benefits of using this development is greater.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Nowadays more and more business meetings and business trainings are taking place online. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
253 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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