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Nowadays people live in the society where consumer goods are cheaper to buy. Do you think it's advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Nowadays consumer goods have become the most important part of people’s lives. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 7
While it is true that in demographic trend, life expectancy of folks has been inclining dramatically, owing to this number of grey-haired people is maximum than youngsters. This eassy will analyse pros and cons of this trend. This phenomenon is creating numerous problems for the society. Most importantly, older generation is dependent and this would cause problems in progress of country. To elaborate this, older people have no enough capacity to do work as compared to young people. Thus, they do not work properly, that leads to decline in development of country. Another drawback is that if the percentage of old citizens become more, it would difficult fot authorities to arrange pensions and old age homes for older people. There burden on apex bodies increases. That is why it is not beneficial for nation as well as government that number of older people becomes more. However, there are some positive effects of this trend. First and foremost profit is that society becomes crime free if number of older citizens is more. There is no violence but youngsters more prefer to crime for earning more money. So, if youth is less in nation then society becomes more successful and pieceful. Besides this, older people have more experience and information about history. Thus, they give knowledge to their children about history and cultures which enchange the horizon among children. Additionally, if there are older citizens in the homes then they tide their families with each others. Hence, these are the profits of this phenomenon. In conclusion, I would like to reiterate that there would be significant positive remifications of having older force more, however drawbacks can not be overlooked, serious though these are.
While it is true that in demographic trend, life expectancy of folks has been inclining
dramatically
, owing to this number of
grey-haired
people
is
maximum
than youngsters. This
eassy
will
analyse
pros and cons of this trend. This phenomenon is creating numerous problems for the society. Most
importantly
,
older
generation is dependent and this would cause problems in progress of country. To elaborate this,
older
people
have no
enough
capacity to do work as compared to young
people
.
Thus
, they do not work
properly
, that leads to decline in development of country. Another drawback is that if the percentage of
old
citizens
become
more, it
would difficult
fot
authorities to arrange pensions and
old
age homes for
older
people
. There burden on apex bodies increases.
That is
why it is not beneficial for nation
as well
as
government
that number of
older
people
becomes
more.
However
, there are
some
positive
effects of this trend.
First
and foremost profit is that society
becomes
crime free if number of
older
citizens is more. There is no violence
but
youngsters more prefer to crime for earning more money.
So
, if youth is less in nation
then
society
becomes
more successful and
pieceful
.
Besides
this,
older
people
have more experience and information about history.
Thus
, they give knowledge to their children about history and cultures which
enchange
the horizon among children.
Additionally
, if there are
older
citizens in the homes then they tide their families with each
others
.
Hence
, these are the profits of this phenomenon.
In conclusion
, I would like to reiterate that there would be significant
positive
remifications
of having
older
force more,
however
drawbacks can not
be overlooked
, serious though these are.
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IELTS essay Nowadays people live in the society where consumer goods are cheaper to buy. Do you think it's advantages outweigh disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
281 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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