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Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians what are the reason for this it is a positive or negative development. v.1

Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians what are the reason for this it is a positive or negative development. v. 1
In the era of modern, more and more individuals are becoming well-liked than the last decade. We can see many superstars on TV as well as live concerts like sportsman, actors, singers and many more. Sometime people very impress by these personalities and they want to meet in the future and get is autographs. Personalities earn more capital as compared to the politicians. There are many reasons due to this phenomenon. According to mine it is a positive progress behind this. The upcoming paragraphs will examine the causes as well as the positive effect of this growth for the community. To begin with, there are enough of causes behind this occurs. First of all, we know very well automation has become very popular in all over the world for the growth of making movies as well as videos. In the last 50 years there was less use of machinery in movies which was not attractive movies for the people. On the contrary side, technology is playing a vital role in making the movies of celebrities. The makers use high level effects of technology, which is made very amazing for watching the people. As well as past movies always made fully actions, but now the trend of movies has varied. Movie have made funny, horrors, emotion, documentaries, actions. As a result, there are major reasons why celebrity earn more property than officers of the state. Furthermore, it is a positive growth in the society of people. First and foremost step is that, when a movie of actor boosts than other movies. This movie not only achieves the high-level credit, but also earn lots of wealth. Actor of this film wants to more popular in the state. He or she has to need employees for working in the movies. They hire professional workers in it. Hence, there is a high chance of increase the income of personalities as well as job opportunities in movies. Last not but least, superstars receive high levels of revenue, which they donate to the poor people and to charities. To illustrate, in the disease era like a corona virus which is a spreading sharply around the world of countries. Many people are suffering in this. Many celebrities invest their money to the needy people like Cristiano Ronaldo, who is the football player. He is very popular and he gives approximately 7 million dollars to the poor people who are suffering in corona, which is known as covid-19. Also he has many hotels, which are transformed into hospitals for the people. Consequently we can say proudly it is a positive progressive. In conclusion, after analysing all the points it is a clarify that celebrities earn more money as compared to the politicians. It is not only beneficial for the communities, but also charitable activities.
In the era of modern, more and more individuals are becoming well-liked than the last decade. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
superstars on TV as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
concerts like sportsman, actors, singers and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more. Sometime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
impress by these
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
personalities and
they want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
in the future and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
is autographs. Personalities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
more capital as compared to the politicians. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons due to this phenomenon. According to mine it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
progress behind this. The upcoming paragraphs will examine the causes as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
effect of this growth for the community.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
of causes behind this occurs.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, we know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
automation has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
popular in all over the world for the growth of making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as videos. In the last 50 years there was less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of machinery in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
which was not attractive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
On the contrary
side, technology is playing a vital role in making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
. The makers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
high level effects of technology, which
is made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
amazing for watching the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as past
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
always made
fully
actions,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
the trend of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
has varied.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Movie
have made
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny
, horrors, emotion, documentaries, actions.
As a result
, there are major reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
more property than officers of the state.

Furthermore
, it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
growth in the society of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
First
and foremost step is that, when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
of actor boosts than other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
achieves the high-level credit,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
lots of wealth. Actor of this film wants to more popular in the state. He or she
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
need employees for working in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
. They hire professional workers in it.
Hence
, there is a high chance of increase the income of personalities as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as job opportunities in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
. Last not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
least, superstars receive high levels of revenue, which they donate to the poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and to charities. To illustrate, in the disease era like a
The term "coronavirus" (= disease) is spelled as one word.
corona virus
which is a spreading
sharply
around the world of countries.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are suffering in this.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
invest their money to the needy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like Cristiano Ronaldo, who is the football player. He is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
popular and
he gives approximately 7 million dollars to the poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are suffering in corona, which
is known
as
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
covid-19
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
he has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
hotels, which
are transformed
into hospitals for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
we can say
proudly
it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
progressive.

In conclusion
, after
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysing' is British English.
analysing
all the points it is
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'clarify' is correct. If 'clarify' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a clarify
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
celebrities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
more money as compared to the politicians. It is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
beneficial for the communities,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
charitable activities.
19Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
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IELTS essay Nowadays celebrities earn more money than politicians what are the reason for this it is a positive or negative development. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
466 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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