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In some countries, celebrities can now earn more money than senior politicians. What might be the reason for it? Is it a negative or positive development? v.1

In some countries, celebrities can now earn more money than senior politicians. What might be the reason for it? Is it a negative or positive development? v. 1
In the contemporary capitalism – based world, there is no doubt that political activists’ earned fortune fall behind renowned influences pay cheques on a great scale. From my perspective, this is significantly derived from the intrinsic nature of aforementioned occupations and mass media’s viral promotion. Whereas, detrimental influence associated with inequality notion can be triggered from this tendency. There remain two principal forces fostering the huge gap in paid salary between political sector and focused – fame industry. To begin with, it is the distinguished diversification of typical features, among the two sectors that have considerably driven the lower income of politicians. While the political party is regarded as a public category and seems to bear limited fruits for the public, remarkable financial benefits are conversely brought to working partners or signed clients by luminaries through modelling shoots, company endorsement, event engagement and so on. Thus, many individuals claim that they serve their lucrative business. Furthermore, thanks to the media mass’s viral promotion through internet channels and brand sponsorship, famous people’s iconic images have penetrated public more widely, compared to politicians’. For instance, a large number of singing concert tickets have been sold out within merely one night in special K-pop organizing events because avid fans would desire for seeing their staring idols. Thereby, popular public attention has helped those celebrities to attain more surmounting budgets. Though some opinions, advocate this trend, I believe that this symbolizes inequality in occupations as pessimistic development. Some people claim that political jobs are not private sector like money – making influences, and so earning burgeoning property can subvert priority motive in serving the country. However, political sector is way more complicated and demanding with diplomatic strategies, rightful national pathways and even public criticism than nearly other businesses. That is not to say without political stability, other sectors cannot be so fruitful in extended profits. Thus, they deserve huge financial reward just as other capitalistic jobs. Otherwise, the large gap in payment would represent a social imbalance in employment fragment and community’s misconception of politics’ importance which negatively aggravate the nation’s instability. In conclusion, the huge gap in earning between political propagates and eminent figures is rooted from their intrinsic nature and public increasing prevalence. Whereas, I argue for the equal payment based on job values and demanded qualification.
In the contemporary capitalism
based world, there is no doubt that political activists’ earned fortune fall behind renowned influences pay
cheques
on a great scale. From my perspective, this is
significantly
derived from the intrinsic nature of aforementioned occupations and mass media’s viral promotion.
Whereas
, detrimental influence associated with inequality notion can
be triggered
from this tendency.

There remain two principal forces fostering the huge gap in paid salary between political
sector
and focused
fame industry. To
begin
with, it is the distinguished diversification of typical features, among the two
sectors
that have
considerably
driven the lower income of politicians. While the political party
is regarded
as a
public
category and seems to bear limited fruits for the
public
, remarkable financial benefits are
conversely
brought to working partners or signed clients by luminaries through modelling shoots,
company
endorsement,
event
engagement and
so
on.
Thus
,
many
individuals claim that they serve their lucrative business.
Furthermore
, thanks to the media mass’s viral promotion through internet channels and brand sponsorship,
famous
people
’s iconic images have penetrated
public
more
widely
, compared to politicians’.
For instance
,
a large number of
singing concert tickets have
been sold
out within
merely
one night in special K-pop organizing
events
because
avid fans would desire for seeing their staring idols. Thereby, popular
public
attention has
helped
those celebrities to attain more surmounting budgets.

Though
some
opinions, advocate this trend, I believe that this symbolizes inequality in occupations as pessimistic development.
Some
people
claim that political jobs are not private
sector
like money
making influences, and
so
earning burgeoning property can subvert priority motive in serving the country.
However
, political
sector
is way more complicated and demanding with diplomatic strategies, rightful national pathways and even
public
criticism than
nearly
other businesses.
That is
not to say without political stability, other
sectors
cannot be
so
fruitful in extended profits.
Thus
, they deserve huge financial reward
just
as other capitalistic jobs.
Otherwise
, the large gap in payment would represent a social imbalance in employment fragment and community’s misconception of politics’ importance which
negatively
aggravate the nation’s instability.

In conclusion
, the huge gap in earning between political propagates and eminent figures
is rooted
from their intrinsic nature and
public
increasing prevalence. Whereas, I argue for the equal payment based on job values and demanded qualification.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries, celebrities can now earn more money than senior politicians. What might be the reason for it? Is it a negative or positive development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
385 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
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Lexical Resource: 7.5
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Grammatical Range: 7.5
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Task Achievement: 7.5
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    Present relevant ideas
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