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n the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v.1

n the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v. 1
More and more students choose to spend their college life in another country for many reasons. Although some overseas students may face difficulties, I think this trend has more benefits than drawbacks. Admittedly, studying in a foreign country has multiple advantages. Most students who choose to study abroad often prefer those universities which are more prestigious than domestic colleges in terms of teaching staff and library resources. These universities enable the students to enjoy a higher teaching quality and a bigger scale of knowledge, which may ensure graduates have a promising career prospects after being equipped with sufficient professional abilities. Besides, young people can be more independent when living in another country, because they need to cope with a number of issues without help, such as paying utility bills. Due to the fact that independence is a necessary working skill, it is more possible for the students who have the experience of studying abroad to have better performance in their careers. However, studying in another country can also bring some disadvantages. Some overseas students may face mental problems because of the suffering of loneliness. They may find it difficult to establish new friendships and may be unable to integrate with a new society. Instead of studying hard in colleges, these students only stay at home all day long and refuse to communicate with others. This may lead to mental diseases such as depressions and insomnia. Nevertheless, this problem can be solved within the help of some related school departments such as a student centre. In conclusion, people who study abroad can gain benefits in terms of academic abilities and living skills, while the difficulties can be tackled. Generally, having more opportunities of studying in a foreign country is a positive trend.
More and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
choose to spend their college life in another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may face difficulties, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this trend has more benefits than drawbacks.

Admittedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
has multiple advantages. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who choose to study abroad
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
prefer those universities which are more prestigious than domestic colleges in terms of teaching staff and library resources. These universities enable the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to enjoy a higher teaching quality and a bigger scale of knowledge, which may ensure graduates have a promising career prospects after
being equipped
with sufficient professional abilities.
Besides
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can be more independent when living in another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they need to cope with a number of issues without
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
, such as paying utility bills. Due to the fact that independence is a necessary working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
, it is more possible for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who have the experience of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
abroad to have better performance in their careers.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can
also
bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may face mental problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the suffering of loneliness. They may find it difficult to establish new friendships and may be unable to integrate with a new society.
Instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
in colleges, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
stay at home all day long and refuse to communicate with others. This may lead to mental diseases such as depressions and insomnia.
Nevertheless
, this problem can
be solved
within the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
related school departments such as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who study abroad can gain benefits in terms of academic abilities and living
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, while the difficulties can
be tackled
.
Generally
, having more opportunities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studying
in a foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
trend.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay n the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development? You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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