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Museums and art galleries should concentrate on local works rather than showing the cultures or artworks from other countries. v.7

Museums and art galleries should concentrate on local works rather than showing the cultures or artworks from other countries. v. 7
Museums and art galleries help visitors better understand the role of history and important artworks, and preserve important collections at the same time. But many people opine that the collection should showcase only the artefacts and artworks of the host country. I disagree with this opinion since art is a medium to express thoughts and ideas beyond boundaries and history of nations are interconnected. Admittedly, museums and art exhibits exist to foster a better understanding of the importance of historical artefacts and arts in our lives and that is why national pride and archives should be emphasised to teach people their national history. But art is an important medium of free expression and the history extends beyond the border. So the collection of a museum should not be confined to geographical boundaries. For example, "Mona Lisa" is a legendary artwork of Leonardo Da Vinci who was an Italian artist in the 15th century. Despite being an Italian, Da Vinci is an iconic genius for the whole world. Mona Lisa is now preserved at the Louvre Museum in France, and having this artwork and many other famous international paintings and sculptures, France can only boast of its fine collection that showcases masterpieces, great artworks and world history to the global audience. Moreover, history is not confined to a single country and if this was the case, we would have taught our students only our national history. The fate of nations was interconnected throughout history and it still is. So when we want to teach our children about our history, we must teach them about international events. Since one of the primary objectives of museums is to teach people about history, they must have artworks and collections from the international arena. Finally, when we display artefacts and works from foreign countries, we are connecting nations all over the world. Each culture has something new to teach and the cultural richness of a nation depends on how they accept a new culture. From this perspective, having museums that comprise collections from the host country is a bad idea. To conclude, museums and art galleries that have national artefacts and artworks besides having international collections are far rich and practical in exchanging cultural aspects.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
visitors better understand the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artworks
, and preserve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
collections
at the same time.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opine that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
collection
should showcase
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artworks
of the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. I disagree with this opinion since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is a medium to express thoughts and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
beyond boundaries and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
are interconnected
.

Admittedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
exhibits exist to foster a better understanding of the importance of historical
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
and
that is
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
pride and archives should be
Possible spelling mistake. 'emphasised' is British English.
emphasised
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
history.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
medium of free expression and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
extends beyond the border.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
collection
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
should not
be confined
to geographical boundaries.
For example
,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Mona Lisa
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
is a legendary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artwork
of
If the term is a proper noun, use the suggested capitalization.
Leonardo Da Vinci
who was an Italian artist in the 15th century. Despite being an Italian,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Da
Vinci is an iconic genius for the whole world. Mona Lisa is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
preserved at the Louvre
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Museum
in France, and having this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artwork
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
paintings and sculptures, France can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
boast of its fine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
collection
that showcases masterpieces, great
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artworks
and world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
to the global audience.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is not confined to a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
and if this was the case, we would have taught our students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. The fate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
was interconnected
throughout
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and it
still
is.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
when we want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
our children about our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
them about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
. Since one of the primary objectives of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
is to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artworks
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
collections
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
arena.
Finally
, when we display
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
and works from foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, we are connecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
all over the world. Each culture has something new to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
and the cultural richness of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
depends on how they accept a new culture. From this perspective, having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
that comprise
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
collections
from the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries that have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
Possible spelling mistake. 'artefacts' is British English.
artefacts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artworks
besides
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
collections
are far rich and practical in exchanging cultural aspects.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
57Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay Museums and art galleries should concentrate on local works rather than showing the cultures or artworks from other countries. v. 7

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
370 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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