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Museums and art galleries should concentrate on local works rather than showing the cultures or artworks from other countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

Museums and art galleries should concentrate on local works rather than showing the cultures or artworks from other countries. v. 3
A focus should be placed on the works of local artists and local cultural heritages by art galleries and museums rather than exhibiting the artworks or cultures of other nations. I somewhat agree, but I also believe that there should be a balance between showcasing local and international crafts. Firstly, displaying local works helps to grow and develop local content. This helps to preserve local cultures which could be passed down to generations. Also, this helps to promote local artists and enables them to focus on their style and grow in it. For example, showcasing a style of artwork from another country, which may look more appealing than a local art may make a local artist abandon his style and originality for the foreign style thereby underrating and killing the local culture. Secondly, exhibiting the local cultural heritage and arts creates healthy competition within local artists. This indigenous rivalry helps to mine creativity within the nation. This brings about different beautiful arrays of artistic display, which would reflect the rich culture of the background various artists in the country. For example, in Nigeria, we would have various displays from the Yorubas, Igbos, Hausas and Fulanis which would be a true reflection of their locality and heritage. Lastly, while I concur that local arts and heritages should be allowed to thrive, a balanced display of international heritages and works provide exposure to the different cultures that exist. Local artists can also learn some things for foreign works e. g. Packaging could be learned from international exposures. In conclusion, I believe that local content and cultural disposition should be projected. However, I also believe that a good blend of foreign works and heritage is needed for learning, exposure and balance.
A focus should
be placed
on the works of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heritages
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
galleries and museums
rather
than exhibiting the artworks or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
of other nations. I somewhat
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
also
believe that there should be a balance between showcasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
and international crafts.

Firstly
, displaying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
works
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to grow and develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
content. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to preserve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
which could
be passed
down to generations.
Also
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
and enables them to focus on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
and grow in it.
For example
, showcasing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
of artwork from another country, which may look more appealing than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
art
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artist
abandon his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
and originality for the foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
style
thereby underrating and killing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
culture.

Secondly
, exhibiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heritage
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
creates healthy competition within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
. This indigenous rivalry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to mine creativity within the nation. This brings about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
arrays of artistic display, which would reflect the rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of the background various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
in the country.
For example
, in Nigeria, we would have various displays from the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Yorubas
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Igbos
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hausas
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Fulanis
which would be a true reflection of their locality and heritage.

Lastly
, while I concur that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
arts
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heritages
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to thrive, a balanced display of international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heritages
and works provide exposure to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
that exist.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
artists
can
also
learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
things for foreign works
There should be no space here: "e.g.".
e. g.
Packaging could
be learned
from international exposures.

In conclusion
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
content and cultural disposition should
be projected
.
However
, I
also
believe that a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
blend of foreign works and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heritage
is needed
for learning, exposure and balance.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Museums and art galleries should concentrate on local works rather than showing the cultures or artworks from other countries. v. 3

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
288 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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