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Multinational corporations have facilitated the rise in the standard of living and economic stability in many developing nations. However, the effects of this influence have been more negative than positive. To what extent do you agree or disagree with th v.1

Multinational corporations have facilitated the rise in the standard of living and economic stability in many developing nations. However, the effects of this influence have been more negative than positive. with th v. 1
Through the innovation of the technology, individuals are spending more time on electronic devices. Some argue that it is weakening our communicating ability in person. From my perspective, I completely agree with this view. To start with, a face to face conversation is an interpersonal skill which takes time to practice. With the growing amount of use on electronic devices, individuals seem to spend more time behind the screens rather than interacting with a real person which leads to a loss of related abilities. Moreover, addicted mobile phone users tend to stick to use the devices even when exposed in social environments or occasions instead of socializing with others. Secondly, tele-communication programs allow more time to compose ideas and words while a real-time face to face conversation is more likely to require instant problem solving skills responding to the counterpart. Without enough practice, it is unlikely for individuals to be proficient in such ability and achieve a successful face to face discussion. On the contrary, it is undeniable that the development of technology also provides information about how to improve verbal skills when communicating in person. And when encountering conflicts, communicating through mobile phones or computers could decrease the impulsive talk by allowing more time to think. However, the benefits mentioned above do not seem to outweigh the negative fact that the ability of communication conducted face to face is declining today. In conclusion, even if there are merits brought by new technology, I firmly agree that the tendency of loss in face to face communication skills cannot be overlooked.
Through the innovation of the technology, individuals are spending more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on electronic devices.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that it is weakening our communicating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
in person. From my perspective, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
conversation is an interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
which takes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to practice. With the growing amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
on electronic devices, individuals seem to spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
behind the screens
rather
than interacting with a real person which leads to a loss of related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abilities
.
Moreover
, addicted mobile phone users tend to stick to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the devices even when exposed in social environments or occasions
instead
of socializing with others.
Secondly
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
tele-communication
programs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to compose
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
and words while a real-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
conversation is more likely to require instant problem solving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
responding to the counterpart. Without
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
practice, it is unlikely for individuals to be proficient in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
and achieve a successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
discussion.

On the contrary
, it is undeniable that the development of technology
also
provides information about how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
verbal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
when communicating in person. And when encountering conflicts, communicating through mobile phones or computers could decrease the impulsive talk by allowing more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
.
However
, the benefits mentioned above do not seem to outweigh the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
of communication conducted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
is declining
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
.

In conclusion
, even if there are merits brought by new technology, I
firmly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the tendency of loss in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
communication
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
cannot
be overlooked
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Multinational corporations have facilitated the rise in the standard of living and economic stability in many developing nations. However, the effects of this influence have been more negative than positive. with th v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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