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Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.8

Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. with this opinion? v. 8
Some people argue that we do not have to remember the basic meaning of festivals, and that most of us good opportunities to having fun. I agree that satisfaction also significant during festival times, I disagree that people have forgotten what these festival means. On the one hand, religious and traditional festivals have a certain crucial role in society. In Uzbekistan, Eid is an obvious example of a festival period when people are most concerned linked to shopping, giving and receiving presents, cleaning their homes and enjoying traditional meals with their families. However, some people look forward to Eid, than a time to practice religion. Similar behaviour can be seen during other festivals, such as Navruz. People associate this vocation with planting trees, cooking a variety of meals, and going to events in local parks, in other words, the enjoyment is people’s primary goal. On the other hand, I disagree with this argument that the original meaning of such festivals has been forgotten. In Uzbekistan middle school, children should learn in detail about the religious reasons for celebrating Eid, Baroat day and different types of festivals within other religions. For instance, late Ramadan, adults organizes a large party to devote old people and they remember the memory of their previous forefathers. Families also play a vital role in passing knowledge about religious festivals to the next generation. Briefly, people generally learn behind this occasion at an early age. In conclusion, whereas people want to enjoy during
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that we do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
remember the basic meaning of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
, and that most of us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
opportunities to having fun. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that satisfaction
also
significant during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
times, I disagree that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have forgotten what these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
means.

On the one hand, religious and traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
have a certain crucial role in society. In Uzbekistan,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Eid
is an obvious example of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festival
period when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are most concerned linked to shopping, giving and receiving presents, cleaning their homes and enjoying traditional meals with their families.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
look forward to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Eid
, than a time to practice religion. Similar
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
, such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
Navruz
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
associate this vocation with planting trees, cooking a variety of meals, and going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
in local parks, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, the enjoyment is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
primary goal.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, I disagree with this argument that the original meaning of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
has
been forgotten
. In Uzbekistan middle school, children should learn in detail about the religious reasons for celebrating
Possible spelling mistake found.
Eid
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Baroat
day and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
within
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
religions.
For instance
, late Ramadan, adults organizes a large party to devote
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
people and
they remember the memory of their previous forefathers. Families
also
play a vital role in passing knowledge about religious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
festivals
to the
next
generation.
Briefly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
generally
learn behind this occasion at an early age.

In conclusion
, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want to enjoy during
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Most people have forgotten the meaning behind traditional or religious festivals; during festival periods, people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves. with this opinion? v. 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
245 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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