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Most of the people accept that we now live in a globalized world but not everyone agrees that this is beneficial. To what extent is globalisation a positive or negative development? v.1

Most of the people accept that we now live in a globalized world but not everyone agrees that this is beneficial. v. 1
In this contemporary nature, everything turned into globalized like scientific development, transporting, investing trends, cultures and environment. And people experienced the new ambience of the world because of this globalisation. It has double- sword development. On the one hand, improvements are necessary in our world like globalization because it has positive developed especially people can go anywhere in the earth and he can enjoy the new prospects of life. In other words, students and labour easily move to other places and they settled there. A study, for instance, conducted by Queens University reported that people migration increased by 45%. Furthermore, country can improve the financial economy through exports and imports. On the other hand, despite above benefits, some problems arise like the economic crisis. This is because country's expanding their business sectors into other areas like USA. For example, USA experienced financial crisis in 2009 and eventually 11 countries got many problems in their GDP. Another effect is danger may arise from culture and language, too. This is because people may prefer to learn international languages like English for their business and study needs, so eventually they ignore the domestic language and culture. Moreover, poorer people do not access the basic technology so that globalization is not all useful for them. In my opinion, it has lots of negative development like tensions may arise between social and political groups because of inequality. In conclusion, although it has both developments, drawbacks are more than the benefits like cultures and languages in danger, political and social tensions may arise.
In this contemporary nature, everything turned into globalized like scientific development, transporting, investing trends,
cultures
and environment. And
people
experienced the new ambience of the world
because of this
globalisation
. It has double- sword development.

On the one hand, improvements are necessary in our world like
globalization
because
it has
positive
developed
especially
people
can go anywhere in the
earth and
he can enjoy the new prospects of life. In
other
words, students and
labour
easily
move
to
other
places and
they settled there. A study,
for instance
, conducted by Queens University reported that
people
migration increased by 45%.
Furthermore
, country can
improve
the financial economy through exports and imports.

On the
other
hand, despite above benefits,
some
problems
arise
like the economic crisis. This is
because
country's expanding their business sectors into
other
areas
like USA
.
For example
, USA experienced financial crisis in 2009 and
eventually
11 countries
got
many
problems in their GDP.

Another effect is
danger
may
arise
from
culture
and
language
, too. This is
because
people
may prefer to learn international
languages
like English for their business and study needs,
so
eventually
they
ignore
the domestic
language
and
culture
.
Moreover
, poorer
people
do not access the basic technology
so
that
globalization
is not all useful for them.

In my opinion, it has lots of
negative
development like tensions may
arise
between social and political groups
because
of inequality.

In conclusion
, although it has both developments, drawbacks are more than the benefits like
cultures
and
languages
in
danger
, political and social tensions may
arise
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Most of the people accept that we now live in a globalized world but not everyone agrees that this is beneficial. v. 1

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
257 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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