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More and more people want to buy famous brands with clothes, car and other items. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development? v.2

More and more people want to buy famous brands with clothes, car and other items. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development? v. 2
These days demand for fashionable items of high-end brand are dramatically growing. Many people would tend to buy luxury goods like clothes, automobiles, accessories and so forth. There are several reasons why the number of famous brands' buyers has been increasing. This essay will analyse the mentioned issue with a reasonable conclusion that it has a harmful impact on both individuals and society. Primarily, this is a strong competition in the fashion industry. Long ago, there were only few well-known trade name producers so they control and monopolize the industry. The consumer who is using luxury brand commodities to feel fulfilled and they find these brands strongly trustworthy. Indeed, purchasing goods from famous brands arouses the buyers’ interest to a large extent and they find it difficult to engage with new, unknown brands which perhaps with advancement design and higher quality as opposed to well-known items. This situation is compounded by the fact that people sometimes through this mindset are compelled to enjoy the things with poor quality. Furthermore, it is an irrefutable fact that possessing these types of products convey a sense of wealth, social status and accomplishment. In some societies, for instance, people believe that individuals’ personality has direct relation to their luxury items. Nevertheless, in my personal perspective, this trend can have detrimental impacts not only on individuals but also on societies as whole. From a social standpoint, in these communities, people will be judged and respected based on their affordability rather than their real accomplishments or moral values. On a customers’ level, since more people have tended to provide real and excellent famous brands, the producer of well-known brands are more likely to sacrifice quality and just pay attention to quantity. In fact, the buyers because of their failing to recognize should pay the higher price for fake goods and at the result they are faced with financial issues. To sum up, the increased consumption of trade name products might virtually have more relevance to people’s daily lives, but in my opinion this tendency is disadvantageous to both society and individuals.
These days demand for fashionable items of high-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brand
are
dramatically
growing.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
luxury
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
like clothes, automobiles, accessories and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth. There are several reasons why the number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
brands' buyers has been increasing. This essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
the mentioned issue with a reasonable conclusion that it has a harmful impact on both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and society.

Primarily
, this is a strong competition in the fashion industry. Long ago, there were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
few well-known trade name producers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they control and monopolize the industry. The consumer who is using luxury
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brand
commodities to feel
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
fulfilled and
they find these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
strongly
trustworthy.
Indeed
, purchasing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
arouses the buyers’ interest to a large
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
extent and
they find it difficult to engage with new, unknown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
which perhaps with advancement design and higher quality as opposed to well-known items. This situation
is compounded
by the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
through this mindset
are compelled
to enjoy the things with poor quality.
Furthermore
, it is an irrefutable fact that possessing these types of products convey a sense of wealth, social status and accomplishment. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
societies,
for instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals’
personality has direct relation to their luxury items.

Nevertheless
, in my personal perspective, this trend can have detrimental impacts not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
on societies as whole. From a social standpoint, in these communities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
be judged
and respected based on their affordability
rather
than their real accomplishments or moral values. On a customers’ level, since more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have tended to provide real and excellent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
, the producer of well-known
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
are more likely to sacrifice quality and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
pay attention to quantity. In fact, the buyers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their failing to recognize should pay the higher price for fake
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and at the result they
are faced
with financial issues.

To sum up, the increased consumption of trade name products might
virtually
have more relevance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in my opinion this tendency is disadvantageous to both society and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay More and more people want to buy famous brands with clothes, car and other items. What are the reasons? Do you think it is a positive or negative development? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
345 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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