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More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation, Describe some of the problems over reliance on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.1

More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation, Describe some of the problems over reliance on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution. v. 1
It is a tendency that, in modern life, people are more dependent on private car which is considered as their main means of transport. The trend may cause several drawbacks to the environment and the transport system, but steps can be taken to tackle the problems. The first and foremost disadvantage is that the air quality will be worsened in the near future. This is mostly because more cars also mean that more toxic gas, such as carbon dioxide and dirt are released into the atmosphere. As a consequence, small dusts in the air might affect not only plants and animals but also human health. More seriously, the gas released from the car is a major reasons leading to the global warming and the greenhouse effect. Besides, another cause worth concerning is that an increase in car numbers certainly make traffic jam heavier. As a result, people have to spend more time on the road than ever before. However, there are ways to deal with these issues. Firstly, the government should spend more budget on upgrading the current public transportation and building faster railway. This can lead to the increasing in the frequency of travelling by public means of transport. Secondly, support policy should be encouraged throughout the country. For example, the government can cut down the price of bus tickets, train fees, which is one of the most convincing reasons to persuade people to use these transports. In conclusion, more and more private appearing on the road brings about numerous harmful effects, yet if urgent measures are available, problems can be solved gradually.
It is a tendency that, in modern life,
people
are more dependent on private
car
which
is considered
as their main means of transport. The trend may cause several drawbacks to the environment and the transport system,
but
steps can
be taken
to tackle the problems.

The
first
and foremost disadvantage is that the air quality will
be worsened
in the near future. This is
mostly
because
more
cars
also
mean that more toxic gas, such as carbon dioxide and dirt
are released
into the atmosphere. As a consequence,
small
dusts in the air might affect not
only
plants and animals
but
also
human health. More
seriously
, the gas released from the
car
is a major reasons leading to the global warming and the greenhouse effect.
Besides
, another cause worth concerning is that an increase in
car
numbers
certainly
make
traffic jam heavier.
As a result
,
people
have to
spend more time on the road than ever
before
.

However
, there are ways to deal with these issues.
Firstly
, the
government
should spend more budget on upgrading the
current
public transportation and building faster railway. This can lead to the increasing in the frequency of travelling by public means of transport.
Secondly
, support policy should
be encouraged
throughout the country.
For example
, the
government
can
cut
down the price of bus tickets, train fees, which is one of the most convincing reasons to persuade
people
to
use
these transports.

In conclusion
, more and more private appearing on the road brings about numerous harmful effects,
yet
if urgent measures are available, problems can
be solved
gradually
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS essay More and more people are relying on the private car as their major means of transportation, Describe some of the problems over reliance on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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