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More and more people are buying ready to eat food instead of cooking themselves. Does this development has more advantages or more disadvantages. v.1

More and more people are buying ready to eat food instead of cooking themselves. Does this development has more advantages or more disadvantages. v. 1
In this modern society, a bunch of people encouraging to eat in hotels and food stalls instead of preparing the food for themselves at home. In my opinion, these habitual changes have more cons rather than pros. Nowadays, people completely packed with their day to day work schedules due to these situations most of them are avoiding themselves from cooking, at the same time they are getting good choice of dishes from various food courts. Which are so economical and delicious in taste. The major advantages towards avoiding cooking is saving the time, gives better chances to explore the tastes and food varieties across the world and it improves the social association with friends and family. Whenever the person feels ravenous outside food is the right option. And the other side of the coin is, it will increase your bills and the same time we cannot guarantee the quality of food. In many restaurants the questionable thing is hygiene, sometimes the food quality checking team found many kitchens found dirty at the same time their dinning hall ambiance is awesome which clearly states about the uncertainty towards what we are consuming. Food trucks and stalls provide a bit clearer picture of the overall cleanliness, still we are not sure about the ingredients what they had used to prepare the item. But in the home, we will prepare the dishes with quality and we have a clear idea what are the ingredients used. And the house owner must encourage the whole family to join together cooking and dining then it will increase the quality time between the family members. If someone is alone and deals with a busy lifestyle then food counters will fulfil his need otherwise outside eating is mostly suitable.
In this modern society, a bunch of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
encouraging
Did you mean "eating"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'encourage' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to eat
in hotels and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
stalls
instead
of preparing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
for themselves at home. In my opinion, these habitual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
have more cons
rather
than pros.

Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
completely packed with their
It appears that two hyphens are missing.
day to day
work schedules due to these situations most of them are avoiding themselves from cooking, at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they are getting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
choice of dishes from various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
courts. Which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
economical and delicious in taste. The major advantages towards avoiding cooking is saving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, gives better chances to explore the tastes and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
varieties across the world and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the social association with friends and family.
“Whenever” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whenever
the person feels ravenous outside
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is the right option.

And the other side of the coin is, it will increase your bills and the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
we cannot guarantee the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
restaurants the questionable thing is hygiene,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
checking team found
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
kitchens found dirty at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
their dinning hall ambiance is awesome which
clearly
states about the uncertainty towards what we are consuming.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Food
trucks and stalls provide a bit clearer picture of the
overall
cleanliness,
still
we are not sure about the ingredients what they had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to prepare the item.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in the home, we will prepare the dishes with
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
quality and
we have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
what are the ingredients
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
. And the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
owner
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
encourage the whole family to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
together cooking and dining then it will increase the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
between the family members. If someone is alone and deals with a busy lifestyle then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
counters will fulfil his need
otherwise
outside eating is
mostly
suitable.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay More and more people are buying ready to eat food instead of cooking themselves. Does this development has more advantages or more disadvantages. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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