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More and more business as well as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally of socially rather than being face to face. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of using technology for communicating. v.1

More and more business as well as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally of socially rather than being face to face. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of using technology for communicating. v. 1
Being contended at workplace is considered to be significant by lots of people. However, in my opinion, I believe that youngsters should prefer monetary benefits that the new job is going to offer them, over the satisfaction at work due to various reasons. On the one hand, I can understand why a vast majority of people give significance to job satisfaction. They have reasons to believe that firstly, contentment at workplace gives happiness to them, which leads to mental peace. These kinds of people are less prone to the problems like stress and high blood pressure. In a recent study by The Times, it has been proven that people, who are highly satisfied with their jobs, live a healthier and a longer life as compared to the people, who are not satisfied. Secondly, job satisfaction and productivity are directly and positively related. The more, the person is satisfied with the job, the higher is the productivity. Thus, job satisfaction leads to monetary benefits in the form of more wages and salaries as a result of increased productivity. On the other hand, I can understand why I believe monetary rewards to be a priority, for youngsters, over job satisfaction. One of the primary reasons for the same is the desire of young people to achieve their dreams. When a person first enters a new job, he has several dreams, for instance, a big car, own house, and it requires money to fulfil those desires. In addition to this, young age is the age to explore new opportunities and to gain maximum benefit of the same, which they are not able to do once they are settled or married in life. Hence, this is the time when they focus on salary that job satisfaction. To conclude, while job satisfaction is significant to obtain mental peace and enhance productivity, I believe youngsters should focus on the monetary aspects of the job, because of the fulfilment of their dreams.
Being contended
at workplace
is considered
to be significant by lots of
people
.
However
, in my opinion, I
believe
that youngsters should prefer
monetary
benefits that the new
job
is going to offer them, over the
satisfaction
at work due to various reasons.

On the one hand, I can understand why a vast majority of
people
give significance to
job
satisfaction
. They have reasons to
believe
that
firstly
, contentment at workplace gives happiness to them, which leads to mental peace. These kinds of
people
are less prone to the problems like
stress
and high blood pressure. In a recent study by The Times, it has
been proven
that
people
, who are
highly
satisfied with their
jobs
,
live
a healthier and a longer life as compared to the
people
, who are not satisfied.
Secondly
,
job
satisfaction
and productivity are
directly
and
positively
related. The more, the person
is satisfied
with the
job
, the higher is the productivity.
Thus
,
job
satisfaction
leads to
monetary
benefits in the form of more wages and salaries
as a result
of increased productivity.

On the other hand
, I can understand why I
believe
monetary
rewards to be a priority, for youngsters, over
job
satisfaction
. One of the primary reasons for the same is the desire of young
people
to achieve their dreams. When a person
first
enters a new
job
, he has several dreams,
for instance
, a
big
car,
own
house
, and it requires money to fulfil those desires.
In addition
to this, young age is the age to explore new opportunities and to gain maximum benefit of the same, which they are not able to do once they
are settled
or married in life.
Hence
, this is the time when they focus on salary that
job
satisfaction.

To conclude
, while
job
satisfaction
is significant to obtain mental peace and enhance productivity, I
believe
youngsters should focus on the
monetary
aspects of the
job
,
because
of the
fulfilment
of their dreams.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay More and more business as well as individuals are choosing to communicate either professionally of socially rather than being face to face. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of using technology for communicating. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
325 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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