Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? v.15

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? v. 15
EXERCISE IS ESSENTIAL FOR ANY HUMAN BEING ESPECIALLY IF THEY ARE DOING A JOB WHICH DOESN'T INVOLVE MUCH PHYSICAL ACTIVITY. ALTHOUGH, WORKOUT IS VITAL FOR A PERSON TO STAY HEALTHIER, WORKING PEOPLE IGNORES DUE TO VARIOUS ISSUES. IN THE FIRST PART OF THE ESSAY, I AM GOING TO DISCUSS THE REASONS AND IN THE SECOND PART, I AM GOING TO GIVE A SOLUTION WHICH HELPS TO ENCOURAGE THEM TO EXERCISE OFTEN. NOWADAYS PEOPLE ARE RUNNING TOWARDS LIFE MAINLY BECAUSE OF THEIR WORK CONSTRAINTS. COMPANIES EXPECT THEIR EMPLOYEES TO WORK FOR MORE THAN THE STIPULATED WORKING HOURS. THIS MAKES AN EMPLOYEE TO UNDERGO A STRESSFUL LIFE. ALLOCATING TIME FOR EXPERCISE HAS BEEN A CHALLENGE FOR THEM AND IGNORES IT. THIS LIFESTYLE MAKES THEM UNHEALTHIER AND EFFECTS THEIR IMMUNE SYSTEM. FOR EXAMPLE, MY FRIEND WAS WORKING FOR A SUPPORT PROJECT IN A NETWORKING COMPANY FOR ABOUT 15 HOURS A DAY WITHOUT ANY EXCERCISE, WITHIN A YEAR, HE HAD LOST ABOUT 10 KILOGRAM'S OF WEIGHT WHICH MAKES HIM VERY WEAK AND OFTEN STARTED TO FALL SICK DUE TO INFECTIONS AND FLU'S. THIS PROBLEM CAN BE RESOLVED IF A PERSON PURCHASES HIS OWN FITNESS EQUIPMENT IN HIS OR HER'S HOME FOR EASY ACCESSABILITY, CHOOSING AN ALTERNATIVE TO GYM SIMILAR TO MEDITATION OR YOGA. THE ANOTHER WAY IS, IF EVERY OFFICE PROVIDES THEIR EMPLOYEES A GYM SPACE AND OFFERING THEM GIFTS OR COUPONS FOR THE PERSONS WHO SHOWS A DIFFERENCE IN TERMS OF THEIR FITNESS LEVELS. FOR EXAMPLE, EVERY YEAR OUR COMPANY OFFERS A TRIP TO AUSTRALIA FOR ABOUT 100 PERSONS IF THEY REACH 10, 000 FOOT STEPS BECHMARK A DAY FOR ABOUT 6 CONSECUTIVE MONTHS. IN CONCLUSION, EVEN THOUGH PEOPLE ARE SO BUSY DUE TO THEIR WORKING CHALLANGES, THEY CAN ARRANGE A MIMIMAL SETUP IN THEIR HOME FOR EXERCISING AND COMPANIES ALSO SHOULD OFFER THEM COUPONS OR PRIZES WHO STAYS FIT AND HEALTHIER.
EXERCISE IS ESSENTIAL FOR ANY HUMAN BEING
ESPECIALLY
IF THEY ARE DOING A JOB WHICH DOESN'T INVOLVE MUCH PHYSICAL ACTIVITY. ALTHOUGH, WORKOUT IS VITAL FOR A
PERSON
TO STAY HEALTHIER,
WORKING
PEOPLE
IGNORES
DUE TO VARIOUS ISSUES. IN THE
FIRST
PART OF THE ESSAY, I AM GOING TO DISCUSS THE REASONS AND IN THE SECOND PART, I AM GOING TO GIVE A SOLUTION WHICH
HELPS
TO ENCOURAGE THEM TO EXERCISE
OFTEN
.

NOWADAYS
PEOPLE
ARE RUNNING TOWARDS LIFE
MAINLY
BECAUSE
OF THEIR WORK CONSTRAINTS.
COMPANIES
EXPECT
THEIR EMPLOYEES TO WORK FOR MORE THAN THE STIPULATED
WORKING
HOURS. THIS
MAKES
AN EMPLOYEE TO UNDERGO A STRESSFUL LIFE. ALLOCATING TIME FOR
EXPERCISE
HAS BEEN A CHALLENGE FOR THEM AND
IGNORES
IT. THIS LIFESTYLE
MAKES
THEM UNHEALTHIER AND EFFECTS THEIR IMMUNE SYSTEM.
FOR EXAMPLE
, MY FRIEND WAS
WORKING
FOR A SUPPORT PROJECT IN A NETWORKING
COMPANY
FOR ABOUT 15 HOURS A DAY WITHOUT ANY
EXCERCISE
, WITHIN A YEAR, HE HAD LOST ABOUT 10
KILOGRAM'S
OF WEIGHT WHICH
MAKES
HIM
VERY
WEAK AND
OFTEN
STARTED
TO FALL SICK DUE TO INFECTIONS AND FLU'S.

THIS PROBLEM CAN
BE RESOLVED
IF A
PERSON
PURCHASES
HIS
OWN
FITNESS EQUIPMENT IN HIS OR
HER'S
HOME FOR EASY
ACCESSABILITY
, CHOOSING AN ALTERNATIVE TO GYM SIMILAR TO MEDITATION OR YOGA. THE ANOTHER WAY IS, IF EVERY OFFICE PROVIDES THEIR EMPLOYEES A GYM SPACE AND OFFERING THEM GIFTS OR COUPONS FOR THE
PERSONS
WHO
SHOWS
A DIFFERENCE IN TERMS OF THEIR FITNESS LEVELS.
FOR EXAMPLE
, EVERY YEAR OUR
COMPANY
OFFERS A TRIP TO AUSTRALIA FOR ABOUT 100
PERSONS
IF THEY REACH 10, 000 FOOT STEPS
BECHMARK
A DAY FOR ABOUT 6 CONSECUTIVE MONTHS.

IN CONCLUSION
,
EVEN THOUGH
PEOPLE
ARE
SO
BUSY DUE TO THEIR
WORKING
CHALLANGES
, THEY CAN ARRANGE A
MIMIMAL
SETUP IN THEIR HOME FOR EXERCISING AND
COMPANIES
ALSO
SHOULD OFFER THEM COUPONS OR PRIZES WHO
STAYS
FIT AND HEALTHIER.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes

IELTS essay Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem? v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts