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Many students decide to pursue their study abroad What are the benefits and drawbacks of studying abroad To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement v.2

Many students decide to pursue their study abroad What are the benefits and drawbacks of studying abroad with the statement v. 2
Many students from all over the world decide to take up higher studies abroad. They mostly travel to rich countries or developed countries in order to find a better future career. There are both advantages and disadvantages in studying abroad, but, in my opinion, there are more advantages to study abroad. Studying abroad has several advantages and benefits. Firstly, you study among people who have come from different countries and you come to know more about their culture, tradition and living style. This helps you when you visit these countries for living or for work. Secondly, students who come from abroad become more independent and responsible. For example, they stay in a hostel, do part-time job along with their studies and pay for the food and other utility bills. On the other hand, there are few disadvantages also. Firstly, few students who never stayed alone and have always been with their parents find it very difficult to cope up with the situation and start feeling home-sick. Secondly the course content is in a foreign language and few students though intelligent, find difficulties in understanding the subjects. This leads to poor performance in the exams. Finally, getting admission into a foreign university is not an easy cakewalk. It requires you to go through a tough entrance exam, lot of paperwork for the visa and certain grades in the foreign language. To conclude, in my opinion, studying abroad has more advantages. Though, you have to go through the tough path but, the end result is fruitful. On successful completion, you have a better horizon and get well settled in life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from all over the world decide to take up higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
. They
mostly
travel to rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
or developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in order to find a better future career. There are both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and disadvantages in studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, in my opinion, there are more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
abroad.

Studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
has several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and benefits.
Firstly
, you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to know more about their culture, tradition and living style. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you when you visit these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for living or for work.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
become more independent and responsible.
For example
, they stay in a hostel, do part-time job along with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
and pay for the food and other utility bills.

On the other hand
, there are few disadvantages
also
.
Firstly
, few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who never stayed alone and have always been with their parents find it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult to cope up with the situation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
feeling home-sick.
Secondly
the course content is in a foreign language and few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
though intelligent, find difficulties in understanding the subjects. This leads to poor performance in the exams.
Finally
, getting admission into a foreign university is not an easy cakewalk. It requires you to go through a tough entrance exam,
It seems that an article is missing.
lot of
paperwork for the visa and certain grades in the foreign language.

To conclude
, in my opinion, studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abroad
has more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
. Though, you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go through the tough path
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
result is fruitful. On successful completion, you have a better horizon and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
well settled in life.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Many students decide to pursue their study abroad What are the benefits and drawbacks of studying abroad with the statement v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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