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Many people today think that homework is still an important part of school while others think that it is becoming outdated. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.1

Many people today think that homework is still an important part of school while others think that it is becoming outdated. v. 1
It is commonly considered by many that the schools should offer a regular homework to the students, so that can prepare well ahead for the exams. Whereas others tend to oppose this idea and believe that homework impacts the mental and physical growth of the child. In my opinion, homework is beneficial for children, as long as it is below the limits. Those who opine that homework is advantageous for the children can easily point out its practical value. That is to say, kids can remember the concepts learned in the school only if they are performing some sort of practical exercises, once they returned home, otherwise they will forget everything. As a result, it will be difficult for them to outperform in their exams because there is a huge syllabus that need to be learnt one day before the exam, which sometimes can lead to the stress. For instance, according to the recent research of the New York Times, 90% of kids are suffering from the depression, due to inability to perform well in the exams. On Further Investigation, it was found that, such kids are stressed because they have never practised the things taught in the school before. On the other hand, there are several reasons which make people feel that homework is a burden for the students. Firstly, homework exercises can lead to busy and tiring schedule, which can restrict the development of the brain. In other words, the children, who spend around 8 hours in the school, are already tired and doing the homework after coming back, can reduce their capability to concentrate on education, followed by weakness of the brain cells. Secondly, for the physical growth of the child, playing is equally important as education. However, if children spend their whole time on studies, they will have no time for physical activities. Thus, teachers should provide homework, which is feasible and does not harm the students in any way. To conclude, although many people believe that the homework reduces student’s mental and physical growth and therefore it should be eliminated from the school curriculum. However, I believe it is beneficial if its within the limits.
It is
commonly
considered by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should offer a regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that can prepare well ahead for the exams. Whereas others tend to oppose this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
and believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
impacts the mental and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
growth of the child. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
is beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, as long as it is below the limits.

Those who opine that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
is advantageous for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can
easily
point out its practical value.
That is
to say, kids can remember the concepts learned in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
if they are performing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sort of practical exercises, once they returned home,
otherwise
they will forget everything.
As a result
, it will be difficult for them to outperform in their exams
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there is a huge syllabus that need to be
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt one
day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the exam, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
can lead to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
.
For instance
, according to the recent research of the New York Times, 90% of kids are suffering from the depression, due to inability to perform well in the exams. On
Further
Investigation, it
was found
that, such kids are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have never
Possible spelling mistake. 'practised' is British English.
practised
the things taught in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.

On the other hand
, there are several reasons which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
is a burden for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
exercises can lead to busy and tiring schedule, which can restrict the development of the brain.
In other words
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, who spend around 8 hours in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, are already tired and doing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
after coming back, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their capability to concentrate on education, followed by weakness of the brain cells.
Secondly
, for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
growth of the child, playing is
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as education.
However
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
spend their whole time on studies, they will have no time for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
activities.
Thus
, teachers should provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
, which is feasible and does not harm the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in any way.

To conclude
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homework
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
mental and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
growth and
therefore
it should
be eliminated
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
curriculum.
However
, I believe it is beneficial if its within the limits.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people today think that homework is still an important part of school while others think that it is becoming outdated. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
360 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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