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Many people think that governments should spend more money on providing faster means of public transport. Some others think that there are important priorities (eg. cost, environment). Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.1

Many people think that governments should spend more money on providing faster means of public transport. Some others think that there are important priorities (eg. cost, environment). v. 1
In today’s fast growing world every individual has tried to give a same priority to their work as well as personal life. Some people think that after maintaining this they build a self-esteem and live a happy life, but some fail because of high a pressure of work also spoil family life. To Begin With, One of the import factor to maintain balance between work and a personal life is an effective time division. This will also help them to concentrate on work, particularly during a job hours as well, having leisure time to spend with family. Moreover, It expands the person’s development in the career as well. For example, in today’s time most of the working women can manage their work and a family by taking advantage of the technology and also some company’s allows them to do work from home. Thus, every person can get an opportunity to achieve their goals and build their self-esteem that increase happiness consequently they live a healthy life. On the other hand, to give a balanced life of the citizen, then the government and higher authorities have to take a certain steps which, will be beneficial for them. Firstly, the government should tell the company’s that they allow a flexibility to their employee, such as a working hour, in some case work from home. Secondly, the government should also make the rules that give the relief to an employee that suffering from serious disease like cancer, heart problems. To exemplify this giving relaxation to such employee creates more positivity and gives strength to deal with the situation. In conclusion, to create balanced life person has to give more effort, but the result of this happy and healthy life even in that person can also achieve their goal as well. Government and company can get more productivity, which will help in the growth of the economy.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
growing world every individual has tried to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
a same priority to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
as personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that after maintaining this they build a self-esteem and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a happy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fail
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of high a pressure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
also
spoil family life.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Begin
With, One of the import factor to maintain balance between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and a personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is an effective time division. This will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to concentrate on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
,
particularly
during a job hours as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
, having leisure time to spend with family.
Moreover
, It expands the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person’s
development in the career as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
.
For example
, in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s time most of the working women can manage their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and a family by taking advantage of the technology and
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home.
Thus
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an opportunity to achieve their goals and build their self-esteem that increase happiness
consequently
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a healthy life.

On the other hand
, to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
a balanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of the citizen, then the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
and higher authorities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take a certain steps which, will be beneficial for them.
Firstly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
’s that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
a flexibility to their employee, such as a working hour, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
case
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
the relief to an employee that suffering from serious disease like cancer, heart problems. To exemplify this giving relaxation to such employee creates more positivity and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
strength to deal with the situation.

In conclusion
, to create balanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
more effort,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the result of this happy and healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
even in that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can
also
achieve their goal as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more productivity, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the growth of the economy.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
It is astonishing how much enjoyment one can get out of a language that one understands imperfectly.
Basil Lanneau Gildersleeve

IELTS essay Many people think that governments should spend more money on providing faster means of public transport. Some others think that there are important priorities (eg. cost, environment). v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
313 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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