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Many people these days have computers, laptops, telephones at their home for work. Do you think working from home has advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons. v.2

Many people these days have computers, laptops, telephones at their home for work. Do you think working from home has advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons. v. 2
Advancement in technology had changed people style of living. Presently, some people have electronic gadgets such as desktops, laptops and mobile phones available at their residence to do their tasks. This essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of working offline. Working from home has several benefits, which has made people workload lighter. To begin with, working in a quiet and comfortable place could improve work efficiency. If a person is working under a loud noise environment, it is hard to focus on work and get the task accomplished on time. For example, the writer is always looking for a place away from a crowd such as hilly areas or place where the population are very less, and then they can concentrate on their work and get it to finish in a particular period. Furthermore, it saves valuable time by eliminating the traveling time and stuck down in the morning rush hours. Moreover, a person can use this time in doing productive jobs and increase their financial rewards. However, there are some drawbacks to work from home. Firstly, while doing essential jobs, it is a must to have privacy around them, but sometimes people face this problem and do not able to understand how to tackle it. For example, anonymous ringing at the doorbell can cause disturbance as well as it creates the gap while performing any critical assignment. Lastly, even though working from is convenient, but many times it has an impact on personal life because sometimes a person gets too much involved in the work can result in less concentration on family hours. In conclusion, working from home would have advantages and disadvantages for many people depending upon their work nature as well as how they manage it, where it depends solely on a person how they make work from home into an effective way.
Advancement in technology had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
style of living.
Presently
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have electronic gadgets such as desktops, laptops and mobile phones available at their residence to do their tasks. This essay will discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
offline.

Working from home has several benefits, which has made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
workload lighter. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
in a quiet and comfortable place could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
efficiency. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
under a loud noise environment, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to focus on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the task accomplished on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
For example
, the writer is always looking for a place away from a crowd such as hilly areas or place where the population
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "is".
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less, and then they can concentrate on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it to finish in a particular period.
Furthermore
, it saves valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
by eliminating the traveling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and stuck down in the morning rush hours.
Moreover
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in doing productive jobs and increase their financial rewards.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home.
Firstly
, while doing essential jobs, it is a
After 'must', the verb is used without 'to'. Probably, you should use "must" or "have to" here.
must to
have privacy around them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
face this problem and do not able to understand how to tackle it.
For example
, anonymous ringing at the doorbell can cause disturbance
as well
as it creates the gap while performing any critical assignment.
Lastly
,
even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from is convenient,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
it has an impact on personal life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
too much involved in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
can result in less concentration on family hours.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
from home would have advantages and disadvantages for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
depending upon their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
nature
as well
as how they manage it, where it depends
solely
on a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
how they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home into an effective way.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people these days have computers, laptops, telephones at their home for work. Do you think working from home has advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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