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Many people these days have computers, laptops, telephones at their home for work. Do you think working from home has advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons. v.1

Many people these days have computers, laptops, telephones at their home for work. Do you think working from home has advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons. v. 1
Many people believe that poverty is responsible for most of the illegal activities. There are many different types of crimes and I feel this statement is true for some of them while false for the others. Let me go into details in this essay about which parts I agree with and which I don't. Firstly, small crimes related to money like small theft and robbery are directly related to poverty. Folks committing these crimes are often doing this for fulfilling the basic needs of their family. For example, Recently in New Jersey, A man, who is unemployed for past 3 months, robbed a neighbourhood department store because he wanted to buy milk for his three year old daughter. We hear such news almost daily on TV. Secondly, lake of basic financial resources creates stress on these families, which results in crime like domestic violence. Adults in such families usually do multiple jobs to make ends meet, which results in a lot of stress and arguments between the couples. According to research studies, 90% of domestic abuse and violence cases happened in families with very low income. In some cases, this also results in mistreatment of children and child abuse. However, There are many white collar crimes which are the result of greed. Wealthy people also commit crime to gain more wealth. For example, during the financial crises of 2008 many bankers on wall street committed crimes worth billions of dollars. In conclusion, It is true that many criminal activities are a direct result of poverty. While many high end crime have nothing to do with lack of money. So in reality it depends on the type of crime.
Many
people
believe that poverty is responsible for most of the illegal activities. There are
many
different
types of
crimes
and I feel this statement is true for
some
of them while false for the others.
Let
me go into
details
in this essay about which parts I
agree
with and which I don't.

Firstly
,
small
crimes
related to money like
small
theft and robbery are
directly
related to poverty. Folks committing these
crimes
are
often
doing this for fulfilling the basic needs of their
family
.
For example
, Recently in New Jersey, A
man
, who
is unemployed
for past 3 months, robbed a
neighbourhood
department store
because
he wanted to
buy
milk for his three year
old
daughter. We hear such news almost daily on TV.

Secondly
, lake of basic financial resources creates
stress
on these
families
, which
results
in
crime
like domestic violence. Adults in such
families
usually
do multiple jobs to
make
ends
meet
, which
results
in
a lot of
stress
and arguments between the couples. According to research studies, 90% of domestic abuse and violence cases happened in
families
with
very
low income. In
some
cases, this
also
results
in mistreatment of children and child abuse.

However
, There are
many
white collar
crimes
which are the
result
of greed. Wealthy
people
also
commit
crime
to gain more wealth.
For example
, during the financial crises of 2008
many
bankers on
wall street
committed
crimes
worth billions of dollars.

In conclusion
, It is true that
many
criminal activities are a direct
result
of poverty.
While
many
high
end
crime
have nothing to do with lack of money.
So
in reality it depends on the type of
crime
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people these days have computers, laptops, telephones at their home for work. Do you think working from home has advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
278 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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