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Many people support use of animals for testing medicines for humans. Others believe it isn’t appropriate to use animals for such experiments. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.5

Many people support use of animals for testing medicines for humans. Others believe it isn’t appropriate to use animals for such experiments. v. 5
There has been an increase in the number of working people facing health issues due to less physical activities. Most of the employees are exhausted by long working hours and prefer to spend their free time on gadgets, but fortunately there are ways we can solve this problem. The working class has to put extra hours and effort in work to grow their careers, but they end up paying less attention to their fitness. Firstly, as the technology continues to take over the world, most of the people today sit on chairs throughout the day and have very little physical exercise. Moreover, they have to work extended hours to fulfil the demand of employers. Secondly, in their free time, they prefer watching tv shows, play games or reading books. For example, people play games on their cell phones and do not prefer going to the gym on weekends. As a result, they do not get enough exercise and suffer from serious health issues later in life. Also, the weekends are spent with family or just sleeping to recover from the tiredness. Fortunately, there are ways to promote healthy activities among the working groups. In the first place, the organizations should promote health awareness by arranging seminars and activities to educate employees. Furthermore, the offices can have their own gyms where employees can workout whenever they have free time. For instance, companies like Google have their own free gyms for employees, which have proven to increase motivation. Also, companies can provide free gym membership to motivate their people. Lastly, all employers should arrange healthful activities like marathons and sports so the people not only enjoy but also gain numerous benefit from it. In conclusion, the workers suffer from serious diseases resulting from the lack of exercise and unhealthy lifestyle. However, companies can address this issue by promoting the awareness and giving opportunities for healthy activities.
There has been an increase in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
facing health issues due to less physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are exhausted
by long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
hours and prefer to spend their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
time on gadgets,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
fortunately
there are ways we can solve this problem.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
put extra hours and effort in work to grow their careers,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up paying less attention to their fitness.
Firstly
, as the technology continues to take over the world, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
sit on chairs throughout the day and have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
physical exercise.
Moreover
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work extended hours to fulfil the demand of employers.
Secondly
, in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
time, they prefer watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
, play games or reading books.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
play games on their cell phones and do not prefer going to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
on weekends.
As a result
, they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
exercise and suffer from serious health issues later in life.
Also
, the weekends
are spent
with family or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
sleeping to recover from the tiredness.

Fortunately
, there are ways to promote healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
groups. In the
first
place, the organizations should promote health awareness by arranging seminars and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
to educate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
.
Furthermore
, the offices can have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gyms
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
Did you mean "can work out"?
can workout
whenever they have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
time.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
like Google have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gyms
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
, which have proven to increase motivation.
Also
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
can provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gym
membership to motivate their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Lastly
, all employers should arrange healthful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
like marathons and sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
enjoy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
gain numerous benefit from it.

In conclusion
, the workers suffer from serious diseases resulting from the lack of exercise and unhealthy lifestyle.
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
can address this issue by promoting the awareness and giving opportunities for healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people support use of animals for testing medicines for humans. Others believe it isn’t appropriate to use animals for such experiments. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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