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Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. Discuss both view, and give your own opinion. v.2

Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. v. 2
Tertiary education is essential for achieving success in life. Students, who get high band scores, usually get a chance to admit in universities, though older students and having a low-mark in school life should also be gotten excess into the higher education. From my perspective, all types of students both youngest with high-mark and adult students with low-grade must have a right to earn knowledge from universities. On the one hand, pupils who earn standard marks in all his academic life, easily get admission at university. The reason is that professors at tertiaries think that since the student has achieved the highest position at school, he must have worked hard. Eventually, he will do a better result in higher studies, and cope with the workload and activities-related universities and its teachers. For example, in school, the top-rated students are disciplined and efficient so that they do their tasks efficiently and listen what their teachers are focusing on. Therefore, the dean of tertiary education selects those brilliant students who could do excellent results. Consequently, this selection generates a higher level of citizens, and socioeconomic will be strong for these intellectuals. On the other hand, each student has the right to study at the university level. It is justifiable to say that if all students get a higher education, any nation will develop immediately. For that reason, universities should give chance to age-students as well as pupils who obtain the lowest marks at school due to the advancement of a country. For instance, in the USA, the renowned universities such as Harvard or Yale - provide their admission form for all types of students, but they should have a quality which could be anything whether skilled at sports, art or higher marks gained in the school certificate. As a result, no one is unemployed when university graduates get their certificate from tertiary education. In conclusion, it is a controversial issue about whether universities should focus on selecting the top-rated students from intermediate level, or, whether they should select senior learners who did not cut a good figure on the previous exam. In my opinion, both types of students must be selected by the universityy for the socioeconomic growth of society.
Tertiary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is essential for achieving success in life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
high band scores,
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance to admit in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
, though older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and having a low-mark in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
life should
also
be gotten
excess into the higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. From my perspective, all types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
both youngest with high-mark and adult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with low-grade
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have a right to earn knowledge from universities.

On the one hand, pupils
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
earn standard marks in all his academic life,
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
admission at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
. The reason is that professors at
Possible spelling mistake found.
tertiaries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
has achieved the highest position at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
have worked
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.
Eventually
, he will do a better result in higher studies, and cope with the workload and activities-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
and its teachers.
For example
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, the top-rated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are disciplined
and efficient
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they do their tasks
efficiently
and listen what their teachers are focusing on.
Therefore
, the dean of tertiary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
selects those brilliant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
could do excellent results.
Consequently
, this selection generates a higher level of citizens, and socioeconomic will be strong for these intellectuals.

On the other hand
, each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
has the right to study at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
level. It is justifiable to say that if all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, any nation will develop immediately. For that reason,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should give chance to age-students
as well
as pupils
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
obtain the lowest marks at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
due to the advancement of a country.
For instance
, in the USA, the renowned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
such as Harvard or Yale
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
provide their admission form for all types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they should have a quality which could be anything whether skilled at sports, art or higher marks gained in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
certificate.
As a result
, no one
is unemployed
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
graduates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their certificate from tertiary education.

In conclusion
, it is a controversial issue about whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should focus on selecting the top-rated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from intermediate level, or, whether they should select senior learners
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
figure on the previous exam. In my opinion, both types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be selected
by the
Possible spelling mistake found.
universityy
for the socioeconomic growth of society.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people say that universities should only offer places to young students with the highest marks, while others say they should accept people of all ages, even if they did not do well at school. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
368 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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