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Many people prefer to live in small towns while others prefer to live in big cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small town and in a big city? Where would you prefer to live? v.2

Many people prefer to live in small towns while others prefer to live in big cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small town and in a big city? Where would you prefer to live? v. 2
Considering where to live is one crucial thing which everybody has to do before occupying any places. Regarding this, the choices between these two may be different. Personally, living in a small town would be more interesting than in a big city. However, both have advantages and drawbacks. According to a significant expanding in human population and the rapid development of the world in every sector which are causing a noticeable increase in human demands, people tend to live in a big city in order to help them in accessing all the things that they need including education, job facility, business opportunity, networks, or other stuff. As a result, the overwhelming majority of societies are living in the city which is again causing really crowded population in the city. Moreover, an enormous number of vehicles are inevitably increasing the risk of getting accidents and also pollutants such as carbon-dioxide that can contribute to global warming. This air pollution will be really annoying for people. Furthermore, the availability of various things such as money and other goods and the huge number of residence can open more opportunities for criminals. In contrast, preferring to live in a small town would be more beneficial. Firstly, a limited number of population and more natural places with plenty of trees can ease us to relax and of course, the level of pollutants is not as high as it is in the big cities. Secondly, the risk of getting travel accidents is lower as the number of vehicles is fewer.   Thirdly, a chance to get closer and socialise with other people is more in the small town. However, regarding the accessibility to the education, important goods, shops, and so forth, moving or balancing the population in cities and small towns can tackle this problem. Nonetheless, people in small towns can purchase any goods from cities and also they can go for better education to the cities. In summary, although some drawbacks may occur when living in a small town, its advantages outweigh the negative impacts. Therefore, in order to get a better and more relaxing life, I do believe that living in a small town is a key for it.
Considering where to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
is one crucial thing which everybody
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
occupying any places. Regarding this, the choices between these two may be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
.
Personally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
would be more interesting than in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
city.
However
, both have advantages and drawbacks.

According to a significant expanding in human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and the rapid development of the world in every sector which are causing a noticeable increase in human demands,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
city in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them in accessing all the things that they need including education, job facility, business opportunity, networks, or other stuff.
As a result
, the overwhelming majority of societies are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in the city which is again causing
The extreme adjective for crowded is "packed".
really crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in the city.
Moreover
, an enormous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of vehicles are
inevitably
increasing the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of getting accidents and
also
pollutants such as carbon-dioxide that can contribute to global warming. This air pollution will be
really
annoying for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Furthermore
, the availability of various things such as money and other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and the huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of residence can open more opportunities for criminals.

In contrast
, preferring to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
would be more beneficial.
Firstly
, a limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and more natural places with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of trees can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
us to relax and
of course
, the level of pollutants is not as high as it is in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
.
Secondly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of getting travel accidents is lower as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of vehicles is fewer.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Thirdly
, a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
closer and
Possible spelling mistake. 'socialise' is British English.
socialise
with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
more in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
town.

However
, regarding the accessibility to the education,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
, shops, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forth, moving or balancing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
towns
can tackle this problem. Nonetheless,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
towns
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
and
also
they can go for better education to the cities.

In summary, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks may occur when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
, its advantages outweigh the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts.
Therefore
, in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a better and more relaxing life, I do believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
is a key for it.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Many people prefer to live in small towns while others prefer to live in big cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in a small town and in a big city? Where would you prefer to live? v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
365 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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