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Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v.9

Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v. 9
It is considered by many that keeping healthy eating habits is difficult. This essay is going to explain why people think this and what could be the possible solutions for this problem. The two main causes leading people to break their healthy diet are fast paced lifestyle and the easy access to junk food. The first one justifies why people do not have the time to eat properly since they are so busy working, studying, looking after their children that they do not even have the opportunity to sit down and have a proper meal. Instead, they have to buy fast food at the nearest place and eat it when they are in transit, for example. The latter one complements the effects of a busy life when it comes to convenience. Due to the ubiquity of oily fast food shops and unhealthy snacks with prices more affordable than vegetables, for instance, those types of food are more consumed rather than healthy ones. As a result, illnesses such as obesity and heart disease are increasely affecting populations all over the world. To address this health issue, individuals, corporations and governments have a role to play. Citizens and companies should reduce their work journey. So that everyone would be able to arrange time to plan and cook their own meals which means eating much more healthy and cheaper because they would be likely to buy more natural food in the supermarket and spend less money on eating out. And finally, to decrease the consumption of junk food, the governments could elevate taxes on these products in order to make them less appealing. To conclude, it is clear that the current lifestyle in our modern society is driving us towards health problems. If the right measures are not taken on time by people and authorities, the level of diseases and early death will dramatically increase.
It
is considered
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
that keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
eating habits is difficult. This essay is going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
this and what could be the possible solutions for this problem.

The two main causes leading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to break their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
paced lifestyle and the easy access to junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. The
first
one justifies why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have the time to eat
properly
since they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
busy working, studying, looking after their children that they do not even have the opportunity to sit down and have a proper meal.
Instead
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
at the nearest place and eat it when they are in transit,
for example
. The latter one complements the effects of a busy life when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to convenience. Due to the ubiquity of oily
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
shops and unhealthy snacks with prices more affordable than vegetables,
for instance
, those types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
are more consumed
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
ones.
As a result
, illnesses such as obesity and heart disease are
Possible spelling mistake found.
increasely
affecting populations all over the world.

To address this health issue, individuals, corporations and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
have a role to play. Citizens and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
their work journey.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that everyone would be able to arrange time to plan and cook their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
meals which means eating much more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
and cheaper
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they would be likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
more natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
in the supermarket and spend less money on eating out. And
finally
, to decrease the consumption of junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
could elevate taxes on these products in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them less appealing.

To conclude
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
lifestyle in our modern society is driving us towards health problems. If the right measures are not taken on time by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and authorities, the level of diseases and early death will
dramatically
increase.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
One who speaks only one language is one person, but one who speaks two languages is two people.
Turkish proverb

IELTS essay Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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