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Many people believe that the world’s most urgent problems can only be solved by international collaboration. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Many people believe that the world’s most urgent problems can only be solved by international collaboration. v. 1
A large number of people opine that the sole way of mitigating the most severe issues in the world is to take a global approach to them. I completely disagree with this viewpoint and I will elaborate on the reasons below. First and foremost, I would argue that these kinds of serious problems could be alleviated by means of local support. In other words, every country has its own role in declaring with such worldwide problems. What is more, there is ample evidence to support the view that this types of local approach to many sorts of problems will likely to work in the long term. For example, it is much more straightforward to raise public awareness of this issue in a particular country rather than in the international community. Secondly, I believe that it is absolutely imperative that we ought to take notice of local support. To be more precise, there would be ample opportunity to mitigate global problems if every person felt a strong sense of responsibility towards such problems and made an attempt to take active steps to solve them. In this case, the government should be in a position to help its citizens to be aware of the negative outcomes of these types of issues and encourage them try to participate in coping with global problems. In conclusion, as the two analyzed reasons above, I strongly disagree with the idea that the only method of addressing the most pressing matters in our lives is the international cooperation.
A large number of
people
opine that the sole way of mitigating the most severe issues in the world is to take a global approach to them. I completely disagree with this viewpoint and I will elaborate on the reasons below.

First
and foremost, I would argue that these kinds of serious
problems
could
be alleviated
by means of local support.
In other words
, every country has its
own
role in declaring with such worldwide
problems
.
What is more
, there is ample evidence to support the view that this types of local approach to
many
sorts of
problems
will likely to work in the long term.
For example
, it is much more straightforward to raise public awareness of this issue in a particular country
rather
than in the international community.

Secondly
, I believe that it is
absolutely
imperative that we ought to take notice of local support. To be more precise, there would be ample opportunity to mitigate global
problems
if every person felt a strong sense of responsibility towards such
problems
and made an attempt to take active steps to solve them.
In this case
, the
government
should be in a position to
help
its citizens to be aware of the
negative
outcomes of these types of issues and encourage them try to participate in coping with global problems.

In conclusion
, as the two analyzed reasons above, I
strongly
disagree with the
idea
that the
only
method of addressing the most pressing matters in our
lives
is the international cooperation.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Many people believe that the world’s most urgent problems can only be solved by international collaboration. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
251 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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