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Many country encourage tourism. Does it bring advantages or disadvantages? v.1

Many country encourage tourism. Does it bring advantages or disadvantages? v. 1
In recent decades, low cost airfare has made international travel easier and many countries have, therefore, developed their tourism industries into key sectors of their economies. While it is clear tourism brings obvious benefits to the countries that host tourists, it is also true to say it may bring disadvantages as well. Undoubtedly, there are significant benefits that tourism brings to a country. First, a thriving tourist industry implies an increasing need for a variety of services such as hotels, transport, restaurants, and entertainment. This results in a considerable number of jobs being created for people who lack a college education and also the development of the infrastructure needed to accommodate visitors. Moreover, tourism is a "green" industry that, unlike factories, generates a low level of pollution. In fact, because beautiful natural landscapes are often places that tourists come to see, a country will often be sure to maintain the landscape in order to keep it attractive for tourists. Despite the benefits, there are aspects of tourism that may prove harmful to a country. For instance, a country may suffer from the loss of their traditional culture. This is caused by people in a country changing their lifestyle, customs, and language in order to more effectively serve visitors or because they become influenced by foreign countries. This can cause stress in a traditional society and could even lead to animosity towards tourists. In addition, because tourists often carry expensive objects like cameras and are unaware of their surroundings, they make good targets for theft. Crime also increases as a result of the increases in drugs and prostitution that caters to some vacationers. In summary, global tourism is greatly beneficial to an economy and environment of a country. However, it can be detrimental in several ways. To my way of thinking, a country should seek to develop its tourism industry because it can bring steady jobs to many people without their need for higher education and without the risk of environmental damages.
In recent decades, low cost airfare has made international travel easier and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have,
therefore
, developed their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
into key sectors of their economies. While it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
obvious benefits to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
, it is
also
true to say it may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bring
disadvantages
as well
.

Undoubtedly
, there are significant benefits that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brings
to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
First
, a thriving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
implies an increasing need for a variety of services such as hotels, transport, restaurants, and entertainment. This results in a considerable number of jobs
being created
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who lack a college education and
also
the development of the infrastructure needed to accommodate visitors.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is a
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
green
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
that, unlike factories, generates a low level of pollution. In fact,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
natural landscapes are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
places that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
be sure to maintain the landscape in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
it attractive for tourists.

Despite the benefits, there are aspects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
that may prove harmful to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
may suffer from the loss of their traditional culture. This
is caused
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
changing their lifestyle, customs, and language in order to more
effectively
serve visitors or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they become influenced by foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. This can cause
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
in a traditional society and could even lead to animosity towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
.
In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
carry expensive objects like cameras and are unaware of their surroundings, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
targets for theft. Crime
also
increases
as a result
of the increases in drugs and prostitution that caters to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
vacationers.

In summary, global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
is
greatly
beneficial to an economy and environment of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
However
, it can be detrimental in several ways. To my way of thinking, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should seek to develop its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourism
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bring
steady jobs to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
without their need for higher education and without the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of environmental damages.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Many country encourage tourism. Does it bring advantages or disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
331 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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