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Maintaining public libraries is a waste of money since there is computer technology. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

Maintaining public libraries is a waste of money since there is computer technology. v. 2
Over the past few decades, there has been a significant rise in the number of educators advocating single-sex classrooms in terms of students' performance. However, there are many benefits of same-gender classrooms, whereas it could have some drawbacks on this and I prefer to study in a mix-gender classroom rather than the other option. To start with, the main positive site of same-sex classrooms is teachers may think that it might be helpful for students to concentrate on their studies. A good example of single-sex classrooms could not only help students reach their achievement in academic subjects, but also they have a prominent expression on tests in order to attend the colleges. In other words, another advantage in same-gender classrooms for teachers could assist students to develop their collaboration or enhance their competitiveness. On the other hand, I am convinced that mix-gender classrooms could have the same efforts as the single-gender classrooms because it would raise students' goals in order to compete with other classmates. However, although there are many advantages for students and educators with the single-sex classrooms, it would have drawbacks for this. The negative sites of single-gender classrooms for students is that they may experience the difficulty and have no idea how to cooperate with the opposed gender in the future of work field. Furthermore, they are possible to face various pressures from the different gender during their learning development. As a result, it may hinder students' learning with only installing the single-sex classrooms. Nevertheless, by addressing the problems of pressures and learning how to cooperate with others, I agree that the mix-gender classroom would assist students to solve a variety of issues and to adapt with others' interaction. In conclusion, it seems that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages regarding the issue of single-sex classrooms. Yet, I am of the view that mix-gender educations would reach the same goals as single-sex classrooms and help them to adapt the situations from schools.
Over the past few decades, there has been a significant rise in the number of educators advocating single-sex classrooms in terms of students' performance.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits of same-gender classrooms, whereas it could have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks on this and I prefer to study in a mix-gender classroom
rather
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
option.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, the main
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
site of same-sex classrooms is teachers may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it might be helpful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to concentrate on their studies. A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
example of single-sex classrooms could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
reach their achievement in academic subjects,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
they have a prominent expression on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
in order to attend the colleges. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, another advantage in same-gender classrooms for teachers could assist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to develop their collaboration or enhance their competitiveness. On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, I
am convinced
that mix-gender classrooms could have the same efforts as the single-gender classrooms
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it would raise students' goals in order to compete with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
classmates.

However
, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
and educators with the single-sex classrooms, it would have drawbacks for this. The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
sites of single-gender classrooms for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
is that they may experience the difficulty and have no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
how to cooperate with the opposed gender in the future of work field.
Furthermore
, they are possible to face various pressures from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
gender during their learning development.
As a result
, it may hinder students' learning with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
installing the single-sex classrooms.
Nevertheless
, by addressing the problems of pressures and learning how to cooperate with others, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the mix-gender classroom would assist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to solve a variety of issues and to adapt with others' interaction.

In conclusion
, it seems that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages regarding the issue of single-sex classrooms.
Yet
, I am of the view that mix-gender educations would reach the same goals as single-sex classrooms and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to adapt the situations from schools.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Maintaining public libraries is a waste of money since there is computer technology. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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