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Long distant flights uses more fuel than cars and brings pollution to the environment. We should discourage non-essential flight rather than limit the use of cars. To what extent do you agree or disagree. v.2

Long distant flights uses more fuel than cars and brings pollution to the environment. We should discourage non-essential flight rather than limit the use of cars. v. 2
It is true that environmental pollution is a major topic of concern. Although I accept that limit long-distant flights could help this situation, I do not agree that it is the only measure that the government should take. It is acknowledged that flight restriction may help to reduce both the consumption of the traditional natural resources and the amount of carbon dioxide released into the air. This contributes greatly to improving the air quality and preventing people from some serious health problems such as lung cancer and asthma. However, I believe this solution is completely necessary, and it has more drawbacks than benefits. Normally, limiting the use of long-distant flights may hold tourism industry back from the development, causing a significant rise in unemployment rate. Also, discouraging tourist air travel may restrict the choice of visitors to distant places. For example, without traveling by airplane, it is hard for Vietnamese people to seek other ways to go to Australia. However, I believe that the government should do more than simply limit non-essential flights. It might be more effective if the government utilize new sources of energy to replace or to reduce the over-consumption of fossil fuels. This can be done by using environmentally friendly energy sources from solar, wind, and water power. Another remedy they could use would be to encourage citizens to change their traveling habits towards commuting by public transports such as bus and train. For instance, in many countries, students are allowed to use buses and trains free of charge, which reduces the number of private vehicles on streets, leading to a significant reduction in air pollution. Finally, it is necessary for every individual to have an awareness of environmental preservation. People can reduce pollution by conserving energy by turning off lights, computers, air conditioners, and other appliances when not in use. In conclusion, perhaps limit air travel may solve the problem related to pollution, but this would certainly not be the only way to protect the environment.
It is true that environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is a major topic of concern. Although I accept that limit long-distant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flights
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
this situation, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that it is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
measure that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take.

It
is acknowledged
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flight
restriction may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
both the consumption of the traditional natural resources and the amount of carbon dioxide released into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
. This contributes
greatly
to improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
quality and preventing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious health problems such as lung cancer and asthma.
However
, I believe this solution is completely necessary, and it has more drawbacks than benefits.
Normally
, limiting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of long-distant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flights
may hold tourism industry back from the development, causing a significant rise in unemployment rate.
Also
, discouraging tourist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
travel may restrict the choice of visitors to distant places.
For example
, without traveling by airplane, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for Vietnamese
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to seek other ways to go to Australia.

However
, I believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should do more than
simply
limit non-essential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flights
. It might be more effective if the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
utilize new sources of energy to replace or to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the over-consumption of fossil fuels. This can
be done
by using
environmentally
friendly energy sources from solar, wind, and water power. Another remedy they could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
would be to encourage citizens to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their traveling habits towards commuting by public transports such as bus and train.
For instance
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries, students are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
buses and trains free of charge, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduces
the number of private vehicles on streets, leading to a significant reduction in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
.
Finally
, it is necessary for every individual to have an awareness of environmental preservation.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
by conserving energy by turning off lights, computers,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
conditioners, and other appliances when not in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.

In conclusion
, perhaps limit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
travel may solve the problem related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this would
certainly
not be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to protect the environment.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Long distant flights uses more fuel than cars and brings pollution to the environment. We should discourage non-essential flight rather than limit the use of cars. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
331 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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