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Living in big cities has a negative effect on people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Living in big cities has a negative effect on people’s health. v. 1
Nowadays some people believe in negative impact of living in metropolitan cities to our wellbeing. I' m agree with this thesis and in this essay I will state my opinion and support it with examples. In modern age we live, our society is exposed to extreme level of stress than ever before in human history. More and more people move to big cities to save large amount of their time traveling to work. Young and productive population seeking their new home in metropolitan condos located in central business district, where is lack of parks and green environment. Lack of nature in our life decrease level of serotonin, what is essential brain hormone, so called " hormone of happiness" . Grey buildings and everywhere presented neon lights also have massive impact to our subconscious, due to this, people are more likely depressed and committing suicide. Live in metropolitan city follows with everywhere presented noise, smog and other pollution. It is scientifically proved, that exhausted gases contains high amount of toxins affecting humans wellbeing and case illnesses such a cancer or pulmonary heart disease. People are exposed into polluted environment every day and with their busy life, its less likely they will travel to country side or mountains for a weekends as big cities are located far away from natural areas. To sum up, I' m strongly agree with fact of negative impact of living in big cities to our health. Environment to what is our body exposed every day enormously affect our mental health as our body heath.
Nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact of living in metropolitan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
to our
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
I&
#039; m
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this thesis and in this essay I will state my opinion and support it with examples.

In modern age we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, our society
is exposed
to extreme level of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
in human history. More and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
to save large amount of their time traveling to work. Young and productive population seeking their new home in metropolitan condos located in central business district, where is lack of parks and green environment. Lack of nature in our life decrease level of serotonin, what is essential brain hormone,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
called
Possible spelling mistake found.
&quot
; hormone of
Possible spelling mistake found.
happiness&quot
;
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Grey buildings and everywhere presented neon lights
also
have massive impact to our subconscious, due to this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more likely depressed and committing suicide.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Live
in metropolitan city follows with everywhere presented noise, smog and other pollution. It is
scientifically
proved, that exhausted gases contains high amount of toxins affecting humans
Possible spelling mistake found.
wellbeing
and case illnesses such a cancer or pulmonary heart disease.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are exposed
into polluted environment every day and with their busy life, its less likely they will travel to country side or mountains for a weekends as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are located
far away from natural areas.

To sum up,
Possible spelling mistake found.
I&
#039; m
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with fact of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact of living in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
to our health. Environment to what is our body exposed every day
enormously
affect our mental health as our body heath.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay Living in big cities has a negative effect on people’s health. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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