Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

it is more appropriate when we understand some one's mistake, wait until the end of the class or meeting and when people are gone, then talk to the teacher or lecturer about the mistake v.1

it is more appropriate when we understand some one's mistake, wait until the end of the class or meeting and when people are gone, then talk to the teacher or lecturer about the mistake v. 1
Societies composed of people with different cultural and ethnical backgrounds have more advantages than disadvantages as a result of this mix. This essay will totally agree with the statement and will show that benefits of multiculturalism in increasing cultural tourism and also how it affect on the fast advancement of a state are stronger than the drawbacks. Different ethnicity and culture makes a place more attractive by tourist in every season of the year. Multiculturalism means to have an enormous component of the cultural travel such as cuisine, clothing, handmade decorations and lifestyles so visiting a place with such different cultures in one place is more than attractive for the tourists. For example, according to the travel magazine in a recent article have shown that the demand for cultural tourism in places such as England has increased by 20 percent as a result of their multicultural societies. The impact on the fast progress of a country is another benefit of the multi ethical and cultural society. In other word, different techniques, the best skills, knowledge and expertise will be mixed together, which will be lead to move secure and faster toward the prosperity. For instance, according an article published by Forbes, has shown that in list of the top ten countries with the highest economic expansion for the 2019, 8 of them are multicultural and ethnic. To conclude, the benefits of having different cultures and ethnicity in their composing help countries to have more cultural tourism and to have a faster evolution and prosperity are much stronger than the drawbacks of multiculturalism.
Societies composed of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and ethnical backgrounds have more advantages than disadvantages
as a result
of this mix. This essay will
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that benefits of multiculturalism in increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
tourism and
also
how it
Did you mean "effect"?
affect
on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
advancement of a state are stronger than the drawbacks.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
ethnicity and culture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
more attractive by tourist in every season of the year. Multiculturalism means to have an enormous component of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
travel such as cuisine, clothing, handmade decorations and lifestyles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
visiting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
with such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
cultures in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
is more than attractive for the tourists.
For example
, according to the travel magazine in a recent article have shown that the demand for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
tourism in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
such as England has increased by 20 percent
as a result
of their multicultural societies.

The impact on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
progress of a country is another benefit of the multi ethical and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
society. In other word,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
techniques, the best
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, knowledge and expertise will
be mixed
together, which will be lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
secure and faster toward the prosperity.
For instance
, according an article published by Forbes, has shown that in list of the top ten countries with the highest economic expansion for the 2019, 8 of them are multicultural and ethnic.

To conclude
, the benefits of having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
cultures and ethnicity in their composing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
countries to have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
tourism and to have a faster evolution and prosperity are much stronger than the drawbacks of multiculturalism.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay it is more appropriate when we understand some one's mistake, wait until the end of the class or meeting and when people are gone, then talk to the teacher or lecturer about the mistake v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts