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It is important to ensure that children with a wide range of abilities and from a varietyof social backgrounds mix with each other at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

It is important to ensure that children with a wide range of abilities and from a varietyof social backgrounds mix with each other at school. v. 2
The ways how children should be educated have been discussed by a lot of parents and educators, especially, how about the educational environment should be. In many countries, parents believe that letting their children learn in a mixing environment with many peers from different families is better than sending them to special schools. This essay will present some possible explanations to prove that idea. First and foremost, learning in mixing environment which includes differences will make children more interactive and open-minded. Opened spaces with many diversities provide children opportunities to encounter many new people, friends and things than in a closed environment. As a the needs of living in diverse environment, children will learn and find new ways to communicate with their friends, that is the time when interaction process of children are stimulated. Besides this, to deal with the fear of differences, children also adapt with them by developing their open-minded thought and respect the differences which exist a lot in their studying environments. Equally important, children will learn more about the real life’s components in the mixing schools. Actually, it can say that a diverse educational space is the model of the reality, thus, in this space, there are a lot of beautiful things from many students. Learning in this kind of environment will support children having an imagination about a true life which created by cultures, languages, individuals and relationships. This environment will enable children connecting with others, then they can share their perspectives about life, therefore, they can also learn from each others and as a result, they understand more about their surrounding environment and the society where they are living in. International schools, for instance, where a lot of oversea students are studying and learning together. Because of that, a lot of people had to admit that these schools are one of the most civilized model of school system in over the world. All in all, mixing educational spaces not only are crucial to assist children to be more creative, interactive and open-minded in learning process, but also introduce children a range of real life’s components. Personally, I strongly believe that is the best method which guarantees the perfect development of children.
The ways how
children
should
be educated
have
been discussed
by a
lot
of parents and educators,
especially
, how about the educational
environment
should be. In
many
countries, parents believe that letting their
children
learn
in a
mixing
environment
with
many
peers from
different
families is better than sending them to special
schools
. This essay will present
some
possible explanations to prove that
idea
.

First
and foremost,
learning
in
mixing
environment
which includes differences will
make
children
more interactive and open-minded. Opened
spaces
with
many
diversities provide
children
opportunities to encounter
many
new
people
, friends and things than in a closed
environment
. As
a the
needs of living in diverse
environment
,
children
will
learn
and find new ways to communicate with their friends,
that is
the time when interaction process of
children
are stimulated
.
Besides
this, to deal with the fear of differences,
children
also
adapt with them by developing their open-minded
thought
and respect the differences which exist a
lot
in their studying environments.

Equally
important
,
children
will
learn
more about the real
life’s
components in the
mixing
schools
. Actually, it can say that a diverse educational
space
is the model of the reality,
thus
, in this
space
, there are a
lot
of
beautiful
things from
many
students.
Learning
in this kind of
environment
will support
children
having an imagination about a true
life
which created by cultures, languages, individuals and relationships. This
environment
will enable
children
connecting with others, then they can share their
perspectives about
life
,
therefore
, they can
also
learn
from each
others
and
as a result
, they understand more about their surrounding
environment
and the society where they are living in. International
schools
,
for instance
, where a
lot
of oversea students are studying and
learning
together.
Because
of that, a
lot
of
people
had to admit that these
schools
are one of the most civilized model of
school
system in over the world.

All in all,
mixing
educational
spaces
not
only
are crucial to assist
children
to be more creative, interactive and open-minded in
learning
process,
but
also
introduce
children
a range of real
life’s
components.
Personally
, I
strongly
believe
that is
the best method which guarantees the perfect development of
children
.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
51Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Knowledge of languages is the doorway to wisdom.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay It is important to ensure that children with a wide range of abilities and from a varietyof social backgrounds mix with each other at school. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
367 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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