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It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? v.9

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? v. 9
It is crucial to raise a child into a good individual in the society. It is common believe that employing a punishment is the best way to establish a good behaviour and maintaining discipline in children. I completely agree with this idea. Parents while punishing must be careful as excess or wrong penalty will lead to negative impact on child’s personality or mental and physical health. They should avoid scolding and smacking children. Many people suggest it is enough to establish a behaviour in a child to distinguish between right and wrong, whereas kids are not enough mature to understand this distinction and they make mistakes intentionally or sometimes unintentionally. If they do not get any feedback they tend to make same mistakes next time. Penalizing will make them avoid the same mistake again and whenever any bad intentions come to their mind, their body will reflexively remind them of past response for similar action. For instance, if a kid makes a drawing on the wall asking them to clean the wall as a little recompense will make them realize this is not the right place to draw. Therefore punishment will be a part of teaching children to be better. Now the question is what kinds of punishment is useful or acceptable and whether it should be in form of physical or verbal? Researchers believe these both must be a very last option for any parents to opt. A study published by Institute of clinical psychology, University of Karachi state that wrong and excess retribution make a negative impression on kid’s mind which leads to mental distress and suppression of positive attributes in child. Referring the above example of wall drawing if the kid was scolded or smacked, chances are he might take drawing as a wrong act and stop drawing. For this reason, parents must act wisely in opting response to teach them a positive lesson. To sum up punishment is an essential part of upbringing of youngsters it will improve the discipline and help them to distinguish between right and wrong provided that parents applied it sensibly and judiciously.
It is crucial to raise a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
into a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
individual in the society. It is common believe that employing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is the best way to establish a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
and maintaining discipline in children. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
while punishing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be careful as excess or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wrong
penalty will lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child’s
personality or mental and physical health. They should avoid scolding and smacking children.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suggest it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to establish a
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
to distinguish between right and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wrong
, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
are not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
mature to understand this
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
distinction and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
mistakes
intentionally
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
unintentionally
.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
any feedback they tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
same mistakes
next
time. Penalizing will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them avoid the same mistake again and whenever any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
intentions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to their mind, their body will
reflexively
remind them of past response for similar action.
For instance
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drawing
on the wall asking them to clean the wall as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
recompense will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them realize this is not the right place to draw.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
will be a part of teaching children to be better.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
the question is what kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is useful or acceptable and whether it should be in form of physical or verbal? Researchers believe these both
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
last option for any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to opt. A study published by Institute of clinical psychology, University of Karachi state that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wrong
and excess retribution
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impression on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid’s
mind which leads to mental distress and suppression of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
attributes in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
. Referring the above example of wall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drawing
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid
was scolded
or smacked, chances are he might take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drawing
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wrong
act and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drawing
.
For this reason
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
act
wisely
in opting response to teach them a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
lesson.

To sum up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is an essential part of upbringing of youngsters it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the discipline and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to distinguish between right and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wrong
provided that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
applied it
sensibly
and
judiciously
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
351 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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