Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is important for chidren to learn the differrnce between tight or wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.1

It is important for chidren to learn the differrnce between tight or wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. with this opinion? v. 1
One of the most conspicuous trends of today's world is a colossal upsurge in the number of people believing that punishment helps to teach good or bad to offsprings in the early years of life while others resist it. I also totally disagree with the former perception and here in this essay, I would discuss my view in the following paragraphs. To commence with, there are deluge of arguments in favour of my stance. The most preponderant one is that children became stubborn and there is loss of confidence among them if parents and teachers give punishment to them for every little mistake because physical torture is not the solution to all problems. It can not only contribute to make them arrogant, but also lead to numerous other problems in various fields. Needless to say all these demerits have far-reaching impact on the society. Furthermore, the another pivotal aspect of the aforementioned propositions is that it is not only likely to help one excel and thrive in varied areas. Besides, penance creates the difference between the relation of juveniles with their parents and teachers and they also hesitate to share their problems and perceptions with their parents and teachers which lead to a lot of mental diseases like depression. They never grow up mentally and physically. There are some types of punishments that parents and teachers use to educate good or bad to adolescents are like logical inclination, freely communicate with children as a friend. For example, a survey is conducted by the teachers of different schools and it is noted that to communicate with the children as a friend is the best way teach them good or bad. In compendium, it would like to state that although punishment is not a solution to all problems, but some punishments help to teach offsprings right or wrong.
One of the most conspicuous trends of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's world is a colossal upsurge in the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to teach
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
to
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
in the early years of life while others resist it. I
also
totally
disagree with the former perception and here in this essay, I would discuss my view in the following paragraphs.

To commence with, there are
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "deluges"?
deluge
of arguments in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of my stance. The most preponderant one is that children became stubborn and there is loss of confidence among them if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
to them for every
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
mistake
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
physical torture is not the solution to all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. It can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
contribute to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them arrogant,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
lead to numerous other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in various fields. Needless to say all these demerits have far-reaching impact on the society.

Furthermore
, the another pivotal aspect of the aforementioned propositions is that it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
one excel and thrive in varied areas.
Besides
, penance creates the difference between the relation of juveniles with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
teachers and
they
also
hesitate to share their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
and perceptions with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
which lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
mental diseases like depression. They never grow up mentally and
physically
.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
educate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
to adolescents are like logical inclination,
freely
communicate with children as a friend.
For example
, a survey
is conducted
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
schools and it
is noted
that to communicate with the children as a friend is the best way teach them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
.

In compendium, it would like to state that although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is not a solution to all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to teach
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "offspring", the plural form of the noun 'offspring'?
offsprings
right or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay It is important for chidren to learn the differrnce between tight or wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. with this opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
306 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts