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People should follow the customs and traditions when people start to live in a new country. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view? v.1

People should follow the customs and traditions when people start to live in a new country. with this view? v. 1
Some people think that foreigners who come to settle in other countries should live like the locals in these new countries. In my opinion, I am not completely against this idea but I am sure that binding people to implement it is very difficult. In some extent, I believe that following the culture in the new countries, which the foreigners chose to live in is very essential. The first reason is people should not make themselves to different with others in their society. Because of this disadvantage, they may be complained by the local people or they may have difficulty adjusting and making friends. The second important reason is to understand the customs and traditions of new places that can help people avoid violating the laws of these countries. Finally, learning about the customs of that country can play an important part in and broadening your knowledge. On the other hand, people still want to keep their own traditions, so according to different cultures or lifestyles is too complicated for them. For foreigners, especially the elderly living in a new country with new customs is very difficult for them. There are many habits they can't change, so forcing them to lead a new way of life will make them unhappy and lead them to unpleasant, uncomfortable things. In addition, everyone in the world has their own country, they are very proud, they may not want to replace anything even if they live abroad because their culture is identical and they Keeping this tradition is the way people show their love for the Nation. Moreover, many foreigners also come to other countries to promote their country's culture, so changing their lifestyle is essential for them. In conclusion, I do not fully support or oppose the belief that people should follow the customs and traditions here when they move to new countries because I think that changing mind to adapt to other society is as important as keeping your own lifestyle to identify who you are.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to settle in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
like the locals in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. In my opinion, I am not completely against this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I am sure that binding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to implement it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult.

In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, I believe that following the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
chose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
essential. The
first
reason is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
themselves to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
with others in their society.
Because of this
disadvantage, they may
be complained
by the local
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
people or
they may have difficulty adjusting and making friends. The second
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
reason is to understand the customs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
places that can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
avoid violating the laws of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Finally
, learning about the customs of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part in and broadening your knowledge.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
according to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
or lifestyles is too complicated for them. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
,
especially
the elderly living in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
customs is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
difficult for them. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
habits they can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
forcing them to lead a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
way of life will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them unhappy and lead them to unpleasant, uncomfortable things.
In addition
, everyone in the world has their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
proud, they may not want to replace anything even if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
abroad
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
identical and
Did you mean "they're Keeping", "they are Keeping", or "they were Keeping"?
they Keeping
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tradition
is the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
for the Nation.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to promote their country's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
changing their lifestyle is essential for them.

In conclusion
, I do not
fully
support or oppose the belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should follow the customs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditions
here when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that changing mind to adapt to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
society is as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as keeping your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
lifestyle to identify who you are.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay People should follow the customs and traditions when people start to live in a new country. with this view? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
334 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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