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It is common practice for some students to take a gap year between high school and university in order to do charitable work abroad in underdeveloped countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people of doing volunteer work? v.2

It is common practice for some students to take a gap year between high school and university in order to do charitable work abroad in underdeveloped countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people of doing volunteer work? v. 2
Volunteering work is considered as an essential skill. It is a widespread practice for certain candidates to take year gap before university and in between high school to carry out charitable work in underdeveloped nations. The positive of volunteering are special consideration and mental satisfaction. Whereas, There are fewer negative for gap year. On the one side, There are some benefits of carrying out volunteering in under developing countries during year gap. Firstly, Students with unpaid work of the society get a chance of getting a shortlisted first in comparison to the other students. Human resource manager segregates numerous application for the job and give highest consideration to those candidates who have highlighted volunteering experience in their resume. Secondly, students who are continuously pursuing studies are completely stressed up and doing some sought of volunteering work in poor nations will give them Peace of mind and this applicant fee satisfied with their work. On the other hand, Apart from the advantages their fewer disadvantages. One major negative of doing such work during the gap year prior to tertiary education and after elementary schooling is time wastage. Students who are leaving their studies in between to take on unpaid service work on the underprivileged nations is not at all worth. They could use this time of gap for gaining some skill. Another issue having the year gap is that it lacks concentration from studies. Students aim is to study well and by offering free work as a volunteer in the foreign poor nation shall distract them from concentration, which they could have invested in learning or take another language course. In conclusion, Although there are some benefits, the drawbacks of doing volunteer work in the overseas underprivileged nation are losing valuable time and lack of concentration.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Volunteering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is considered
as an essential
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
. It is a widespread practice for certain candidates to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
university and in between high school to carry out charitable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in underdeveloped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
are special consideration and mental satisfaction. Whereas, There are fewer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
year.

On the one side, There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits of carrying out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
in under
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
with unpaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
of the society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a chance of getting a shortlisted
first
in comparison
to the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. Human resource manager segregates numerous application for the job and give
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
consideration to those candidates who have highlighted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
experience in their resume.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are
continuously
pursuing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
are completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
up and doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sought of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
volunteering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
will give them Peace of mind and this applicant fee satisfied with their work.

On the other hand
, Apart from the advantages their fewer disadvantages. One major
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
of doing such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
prior to tertiary education and after elementary schooling is time wastage.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
who are leaving their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
in between to take on unpaid service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
on the underprivileged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
is not at all worth. They could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this time of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
for gaining
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
. Another issue having the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
is that it lacks concentration from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
aim is to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
well and by offering free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as a volunteer in the foreign poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
shall distract them from concentration, which they could have invested in learning or take another language course.

In conclusion
, Although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits, the drawbacks of doing volunteer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in the overseas underprivileged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
are losing valuable time and lack of concentration.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
37Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay It is common practice for some students to take a gap year between high school and university in order to do charitable work abroad in underdeveloped countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages for young people of doing volunteer work? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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